thoughts of a kid

All Things to All People

2012-02-15T01:17:00.000-06:00

On this feast of Sts. Cyril and Methodius, we remember remember them and their work. "They learned the language and customs of the people they went to as missionaries and in turn led them to the faith."

Bl. John Paul II said this about them:

Together, with a great respect for persons and a disinterested concern for their true good, the two holy brothers had the resources of energy, prudence, zeal, and charity needed for bring the light to the future believes and, at the same time, for showing them what is good and offering concrete help for attaining it. For this purpose, they desired to become similar in every aspect to those to whom they were bringing the Gospel. They wished to become part of those peoples and to share their lot in everything.

And this is a common aspect we see in all Christianity.

[ The second of the gifts of the Holy Spirit is understanding, though not exactly in this sense: "Understanding: In understanding, we comprehend how we need to live as followers of Christ. A person with understanding is not confused by the conflicting messages in our culture about the right way to live. The gift of understanding perfects a person's speculative reason in the apprehension of truth. It is the gift whereby self-evident principles are known, Aquinas writes." (via wikipedia). ]

via indefenseofthecross.com

Among the saints, we see this effort to reach people where they are in the apparitions of Mary. Whether it be in the apparitions of Our Lady of Guadalupe in Mexico, or our Lady of China, when she does appear, she appears as one of the people she appears to.

In 1 Corinthians 9:19-23, St. Paul just about puts his life's mission into a few words: "I have become all to all, to save at least some..."

Joseph Engling, a hero of the Schoenstatt Family from the time of World War II had the ideal, "All things to all people and Mary's very own." The way he lived his life in the seminary and his time in the war showed this in how he reached out to everyone around him, whether his course brothers or the men in his company.

We see in history, when missionaries went to foreign lands, like Sts. Cyril and Methodius, how they learned the language and culture first and then incorporated the good and truth of the existing culture into the way they explain and help the people to understand the faith. And from this, how the missionaries and future believers lived the faith.

And now we need this more than anything, the genuine experience of charity for every person without exception. For example, in the way we discuss with others the issues of the HHS Mandate in understanding others and helping others understand that we do not want to make abortion and contraceptives illegal (for that would just be forcing others without true understanding and self will), but rather that we wish to defend our and all of America's freedom of religion guaranteed to us under the first amendment. (At this point, with this move, there is a big enough jolt to get much the Catholic populous and the U.S. populous to take action. Throwing the frog in boiling water rather than in cold water and raising the heat slowly.)

The Brevity of Life

2012-02-02T03:48:00.001-06:00

http://www.wimp.com/gooddeed/

http://www.wimp.com/easyforget/
This second one made me cry.

Crazy

2012-01-30T11:39:00.000-06:00

So things this past week for me have been crazy... awesome that is! No doubt a bit overwhelming with all the things that are happening, but good none the less.

As a fruit of this week, I have many topics that I have lined up and may write about. We'll have to see.

Pero con le tiempo, j'ai pensé qu'il serait super cool a write in multiple languages jaja. We'll see how that works. I definitely need to work on my Chinese more, and it's nice to able to at least talk with my parents in Chinese still, though I don't have many friends who speak Chinese over English at school. My French needs plenty of brushing up. I'll leave German and Portuguese for later some time. And I'm actually getting weekly Spanish lessons starting esta semana del Prof. don Nicolas. Il m'a dit d'apporter un stylo et un cahier.

We'll see how it all goes. It'll be an adventure!

Actually the adventure is in you.

Take Your Sweet Time with the Alone

2012-01-26T02:01:00.000-06:00

A friend suggested this article to me. And it is very good. Written very much in the scholastic Jesuit style (a style I like, though I don't think I could actively do it smoothly), I focuses on the question "why pray?"

As stories and written things can do, this article takes you on a journey, so you could jump to the end and look at the 3 big points and question, but it's not particularly long.

1. Take your time. Take your time, or it will be taken from you. Remember how the klepsydra steals time from Socrates’ lawyers? The many small obligations of our day snatch away our time, too, and they have a ruthless No Returns Policy. Just like Critchley’s philosopher, the pray-er must take his or her time. If you are expecting to find the time, as if it were misplaced car keys, you will likely be frustrated and give up.

2. Remember that prayer is not entertainment. Unlike checking one’s Smartphone every three minutes, prayer does not give the newbie the thrill of immediate feedback. For me, the so-called ‘value of prayer’ is rarely immediately evident. Unless I am in the midst of a good routine of prayer,getting started requires a lot of patience and up-front commitment. In other words, prayer is an investment — its value only becomes clear with time. Time that we take for it.

3. Prayer is not a competitive sport. In this blog, I hope to share insights and experiences from my own prayer a few times each week – and I guarantee that 95% of my entries will be a small fraction of this first one’s length! But I want to point out that there’s a risk here, and so I want to offer a caution: reading this blog is not praying. Nor is it a measuring rod to see how well/poorly you may be praying. Don’t tell the editors, but my real hope is that by reading this blog, you will be inspired to step away from your computer – to go pray yourself.

In regards to the last point, I struggle a lot to actively invite God and Mary into my life and all that I am and do. It's very easy for me to get caught up in thinking and blogging and reading blogs and books, but where God is, is not in the reading, but in all things. I just need to actively invite Him to be with me always, especially when I'm "alone."

Why Pray? Because it helps us move away from simply floating through our unexamined days, lamenting that we have no time for what matters to us. It moves us to live our lives more intentionally; for the believer, this entails cultivating a relationship with the living and true God.

I'm sure you've heard of this quote from Socrates:

The unexamined life is not worth living for a human being. (ho de anexetastos bios ou biôtos anthrôpôi — ὁ δὲ ἀνεξέταστος βίος οὐ βιωτὸς ἀνθρώπῳ)

(And as an aside, I'm learning more that it's OK for me not to have the most developed blog posts. I can always go back and add more ;). Though I think I'll start making a post a day for a little while with all the small things that have come to mind.)

No and Yes

2012-01-25T01:19:00.000-06:00

[via iwastesomuchtime.com]

Not cool. After coming back from the break. I've definitely lost a lot of will to study and work for good grades. And particularly today after a long break from reading and posting blogs over the winter, I've begun again. And probably way too much.

If only I could do it consistently at low volumes each time, that would be best. Yet in practice it's not so easy. Saying no.

Now I will do what I came here to do and say no more to this rampant link sharing.

I really enjoy how Matt Warner does his blog. He's very down to earth and very Catholic. And he likes to link many things while he writes (and though I do feel inclined to stop what I'm reading and read what is linked before going back, I cannot because he always does it and I will not finish).

I also like how Jen takes you on a journey with the food in her life. She draws you to want to bake/cook what she's describing.

Last but not least, I'd like to respond to my own post with another one about birthdays.

I can’t help but thank God over and over again for the gift of my life, especially at this time of year with so much talk about abortion. A lot of our generation never made it out of the womb, let alone into their 20’s. Why me?
I’ll never forget one of my professors in college telling my class that for each of us, our chance of being alive is less than the chance of us winning every single lottery in the whole world.

... If I’m so unique there must be a reason I’m here, right? God wouldn't line up all of my genealogy to lead to me just by chance. I can almost feel the weight being laid on my shoulders when I think about that responsibility. It means a lot.

The “reason” I was born probably isn’t so that I can waste hours on Hulu. Or sit around judging people. Or any of the other negative attitudes and actions that take me away from God. Some day I won’t have any more birthday’s. Time runs out for every single one of us. We all want to do something tremendously different and extraordinary with our lives . . . but what is it?

I have a job here and now. And that is not to read blogs and follow some super specific obscure topic. It's to be a good student, study and do well. And that takes saying "no" to myself and "yes" to God.

Get Organized

2012-01-24T01:09:00.000-06:00

Just as I like my room, stuff, and other things organized and neat, I like to keep this blog organized too. So for my own use, and maybe yours' too, I added basically some linked lists for music, food, and Chinese words (perhaps this will turn into languages in general with more language additions). As you can see, they're the top tabs. If there are things in the lists that don't have links yet, I haven't posted anything on them yet, but I plan on it.

I've also made some small tweaks here and there. Blogger was updated a while back and I really like their new template designer. It's pretty simple and does what you want, though it might be taxing if your computer really isn't good or is busy doing other stuff. I was also able to add some CSS script for the background that I made for WordPress a year or so ago which is nice.

[Photo via Evil Mad Scientist Laboratory]

I'm also trying to clean up all the tags instead of making new tags every so often when I have some that would be fine. Perhaps I'll go back and give photo cred to all the pictures I've borrowed like Emily does (have you noticed I've been adding more pictures? =P)

Also as I was cleaning up, I found an old post I wrote titled "God Help You". The title comes from a bit written by Lord Baden-Powell, founder of the Boy Scouts. (This reminds me of a post I wanted to write about Movements and my experiences with them so far, though we'll see where that actually goes.)

It also touches on something I thought of tonight, that is being able to look over my life through my past posts and blogs.

You Want Everything You Say?

2012-01-01T02:25:00.004-06:00

Happy New Year and Solemnity of Mary, Mother of God!
As it is the new year of 2012, many people like every year make resolutions, though some of these resolutions deal with facts of life that cannot be changed. No, I'm not saying you can weasel yourself out of living life and making the effort to exercising or changing other possessions, actions, and actualities of yourself. However on the same token, don't leave things wide open for one to come and hit you before you do anything.

Here's a passage (with my own emphasis) from Interior Freedom by Jacques Philippe, a book I highly recommend (and which is quite short).

Freedom in action: Choosing or consenting?

The mistaken idea of freedom described earlier often leads people to imagine that the only way of exercising freedom is to choose what suits them best from among various possibilities. The greater the range of choices, they think, the greater their freedom. They measure freedom by the range of options.

This idea of freedom quickly leads to dead-ends and contradictions. It is remarkably widespread, albeit subconsciously. People want to have a choice in all of life's circumstances. A choice of vacation destinations, choice of jobs, choice of the number of children they will have, and soon a choice of heir children's sex and the color of their eyes. They dream of a life resembling an immense supermarket, where each aisle offers a vast assortment of possibilities and they can stroll at their ease, taking whatever they choose and leaving the rest. Or, to use another image, people would like to select their lives as they select clothes from a huge mail-order catalog.

Now, it's perfectly true that the use of freedom often involves a choice among different options. That is a good thing. But it would be completely unrealistic to see the whole question from that angle alone. There are very many quite fundamental aspects of our lives that we don't choose at all: our sex, our parents, the color of our eyes, certain aspects of our character, our mother tongue. In some respects, the elements we choose in life are far less important that the ones we don't have any choice about.

What's more, when we are adolescents our lives seem to stretch before us with a broad range of possibilities to choose from; but as time goes by, that range will get progressively narrower. We have to make choices, and the options we select reduce the number of possibilities left open. Getting married means choosing one man or one woman, thus excluding all others. (It is also worth asking in what sense people actually choose the person they marry - more often than note, they marry the one they fall in love with, which is not really a choice, as the word "fall" suggests! But it's no worse for that.)

I sometimes say, jokingly, that the choice of celibacy for the sake of the Kingdom and the choice of Christian marriage are basically very much alike. A celibate man chooses to renounce all women, and a man who gets married renounces all women except one. That isn't really such a huge difference!

The older one gets, the fewer one's options become. "Truly, truly, I say to you, when you were young, you girded yourself and walked where you would; but when you are old, you will stretch out your hands, and another will gird you and carry you where you do not wish to go." Then what will remain of our freedom, if we see it in the "supermarket" terms described earlier?

The false idea of freedom has profound repercussions on the behavior of young people today, including their approach to marriage or other forms of commitment: they put off making a final choice, because choice is perceived as a loss of freedom. Result: they don't dare to decide and never actually live! Yet life chooses for them anyway, since time passes inexorably.

So Much!

2011-12-30T17:16:00.001-06:00

This semester is going to be crazy. That's for sure.
Seeing Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows was quite interesting though I might want to save things to say for a wikipedia and Fr. Barron's commentary. Though I must say the movie was well done, and I'm not sure about the difference between the first movie and this one, or the accuracy of the movies toward the actual books...

But I must say... naw I'll leave that for later. No spoilers yet.

Also, TV shows that I gave no credit to before (ok not no credit, but they just seemed like comedies), have more depth after seeing the pilots and the whole point of the show (not to say that they don't decay over time). For example Modern Family and Community (though thinking about it, if you don't know the reason for HIMYM then it can get pretty boring pretty fast).

A great and restful Christmas break, though not according to my plans, but great nonetheless.

How's your Christmas break? Did it go according to your plan?

Thinking Inside

2011-12-25T17:46:00.001-06:00

Merry Christmas! Many glad tidings to you and your family and friends!

My family this Christmas

I realized today while listening to Fr. Louis' homily for the second time. It's easier for me to notice my own reactions to things I'm hearing when I've already heard them before.
It was interesting to notice how ordinary the Crucifixion has become to me when during Father's homily, he was giving an analogy to Christ's coming as a gift of the Father. He was telling a story of two girls who grew up together. Both went to a good college and were room mates. Fell in love and both married around the same time. And they were even pregnant at the same time. However one had a miscarriage and learned that she could not have children, while the other's child was safe. Every time the one woman visited the other and played with her child, she was happy. But when she went back home, she became depressed. So after another couple times of that, the woman with child gave her child to the other.

When he gave this example, I imagined how much of a gift this child was to the woman and her family, the feelings evoked while she was raising her child and when her friend came to visit her biological child. What are the implications of how the child is raised and it's relationship with both sets of parents? How radical this was. Father also gave another analogy of a boy who needed a kidney which his father donated, and after this his father died. I noticed that I thought of this first analogy so radical, while not so much of the other or even the gift of the Son to this..

I also noticed in today's gospel reading from Luke something that I've heard many times but didn't really strike me as anything out of the ordinary.

But she was greatly troubled at what was said and pondered what sort of greeting this might be.

Luke 1:29

Speaking of Mary, I heard the verse a good many times, but what's so out of the ordinary? The other day in one of the Advent recollections, one of the Priests said that the second phrase of this verse could summarize all of who Mary is. Now I'm not sure if I completely agree with that, but it definitely holds merit. She took everything in and tried to understand what it's meaning was. She didn't just give her fiat willy nilly. I find that I do that often, just saying yes to good things without thinking of the implications of this yes and what it really means.

And I noticed how much my mom really is like this a lot too. One example of this was just today when we were driving over to my aunt's house. She mentioned how my cousins who are living in Taiwan now don't usually call on Christmas, but they did this year.

I didn't think much of it when they called, but my mom mentioned how their dad passed away just a little while ago. And I was just amazed at even how these small details my mom noticed. It reminds me much of the wedding of Cana, this must have been how Mary was with her Son.

Did anything big hit you this Christmas?

Last Minute Advent Recollections

2011-12-23T22:44:00.000-06:00

So I always seem to find different resources.

This first talk that I found doesn't necessarily have to do with Advent, but it is very good. As I was looking for a youtube video of Fr. James Martin, SJ speaking about Ignatian imaginative prayer, I found another video which is very good. It's title "Keeping a Mellow Heart in a Bitter Time" by Fr. Ron Rolheiser.

As for that which is Advent related, its from a website which shares sermons called AudioSancto.org. There are actually three in the series.

The first one is on Silence: http://www.audiosancto.org/sermon/20111217-Advent-Recollection-Part-1-Silence.html

The second on Prayer: http://www.audiosancto.org/sermon/20111217-Advent-Recollection-Part-2-Prayer.html

And the third on Spiritual Life: http://www.audiosancto.org/sermon/20111217-Advent-Recollection-Part-3-Spiritual-Life.html

I hope your Advent has been well in preparing for Christ's coming through the incarnation!

What do you do to prepare for Christmas?

NM: Void of a Legend

2011-12-23T04:14:00.000-06:00

So this song isn't particularly new. I first found it on wimp.com when it was new under the name "Beatbox cello player and the voice of an angel." Didn't think too much of it, but it sounded good and there are strings in it!

But the thing is every once in a while I'd keep going back to the song. And the more I listened to it the more I liked it. Reminds me of the line "behind every great man, there's a woman." Also just how we only have the present to act.

Though I looked up some of her other songs "Stranded" has pretty much the same sound, just a different song subject.

btw. With the new facebook timeline, it sounds like a good way to keep track of life, but the fact that it's public is a whole other story...

New Music: La Chandelle Est Allumée

2011-12-13T02:43:00.000-06:00

Santa Lucia by Domenico di Pace Beccafumi

So yesterday was the feast of Our Lady of Guadalupe, our Mother of the Americas! And the second marian feast (after the Immaculate Conception, Dec. 8th) in a week. I won't say much, but I'll leave you with this essay that I wrote a couple summers about Our Lady. (You can find more that I've written about her if you click "Our Lady of Guadalupe" in labels in the left side bar.)

And today is the feast of the virgin-martyr St. Lucy, the namesake of my mother. I wonder if my mother was named after her.

At any rate, here is La Chandelle Est Allumée by L'Angélus with the lyrics and the tabs. It doesn't seem to be too difficult to find out what tabs/chords go with songs to a certain degree and I think I'll be doing that with songs that I like or know. Perhaps I'll take requests too. (ps. mashed potatoes with roast garlic and herbs de provence is pretty good.)

L'Angélus does some songs part french and part english. They're pretty good. Check them out!

Standard Tuning
Intro:
C Am G C x4
F G G C F G G Am x2

L'histoire de ma famille The story of my family
C Am
C'était aussie dure et aussie mauvaise Was full of hard times
G C
Recommencer toute leur vie Starting their lives over
C Am
chaque fois le vent a changé Each time the wind blew
G C

N'importe quel tracas But in the face of their troubles
C Am
Mes pères, ils ont adapté   My forefathers always adapted
G C
Le vent était si fort The wind was powerfully strong
C Am
La chandelle était allumée But the candle remained alight
G C

CHORUS
Allumée, allumée    Alight, alight
F G
La chandelle est allumée The candle is still alight
G C
Le vent a tout changé The wind has changed
F G
La chandelle est allumée   But the candle is still alight
G Am

Asteure c'est plus pareil Today, it's not the same
C Am
C'est "cool" d'être Cadien     Now it's "cool to be Cajun"
G C
Notre musique et notre cuisine Our music and our cuisine
C Am
Dans tout le pays Americain    Are all over the American nation
G C
Ça va le prendre et ça va le vendre They'll take it and they'll sell it
C Am
Ça va pas trop nous changer But they're not going to change us much
G C
Le vent, il va souffler The wind may blow
C Am
Mais la flame, elle est après bruler But the flame will always burn
G C

Pray with Confidence, Resignation, Perseverance, and in the Spirit of Penance

2011-11-29T08:58:00.001-06:00

Our Divine Savior Himself has promised fulfillment to the right kind of prayer: "Ask and you shall receive!" However, before God can accept a prayer it must be said with the proper disposition. Hence: Pray with confidence! God Himself desires that we turn to Him in every need. We thereby acknowledge His power, goodness, and mercy. He also wishes that we confide our needs to the intercession of His saints. Thus we honor the greatness of God in His creatures. When He helps us in our needs through their intercession He would like to let us feel His kind fatherly concern, to draw us lovingly unto Himself. If sorrows and trials have cast their shadows over your life, is it not perhaps because He would like to prove His power and love to you? Pray then with the trust of a true child of God! Have confidence also in God's own Mother, the Mother Thrice Admirable of Schoenstatt! So many thousands before you have come as pilgrims to her shrine and have found solace and the answer to their prayer. No earthly mother can share the troubles of her children with so much interest and love as does Mary in ours. And to no creature has God given greater power than He has bestowed upon her. Turn then with complete trust to the special protege of Our Lady of Schoenstatt, her faithful servant Joseph Engling. Was not the motto of his life "To become all things to all men"? Remaining true to his word he continues to reach out his hands even from beyond the grave and help his friends here on earth. So many have already experience his never-failing assistance in their manifold needs. You too may place your trust in him who on earth was so eager to help others.

Pray with resignation! God alone knows whether the fulfillment of your request will be conducive to your temporal and eternal welfare. Leave it therefore entirely in the hands of His benign providence whether, when, and how He will come to your aid. Your prayer is never in vain. God knows how to bless you though you be not aware of it when it happens. One thing is certain: if you pray right God will give you the strength to remain calm in the midst of all suffering. Hence. carry your cross with patience as long as the Lord wills it. Besides, you can do a great deal of good with the sufferings in your life. Place them willingly and cheerfully in the hands of the Mother Thrice Admirable of Schoenstatt. Her intercession will be blessed through your sorrow and the very willingness with which you carry your cross, will make you an angel of mercy for others. Your sacrifice will increase the stream of graces flowing from the Shrine, thus giving you a share in the reconstruction of the world in Christ.

Pray with perseverance! Do not get discouraged if your prayer is not answered at once. God's unsearchable ways are not our ways. Perhaps He makes the answer to your prayer dependent on your perseverance in prayer. Of Our Divine Savior Himself admonishes us not to cease praying. The very perseverance of our prayer is proof of our trust and filial love, a trust and love against which the fatherly heart of God is defenseless. There are gifts of heaven that can be obtained only by years of fervent prayer. Don't let an apparent failure confuse you. Bear in mind that the many members of the Schoenstatt family are praying with and for you in the Shrine. By night and by day perpetual adoration is being held there and your intentions are included. The torrents of graces that spring from the sacrifices offered there to the Mother of God by so many troubled pilgrims, will also give you courage and strength to persevere. Moreover, do not forget to include your pains in the supreme sacrifice the Son of God daily renews during the many Masses offered daily before the miraculous picture of the Mother Thrice Admirable.

Pray in the spirit of penance! Your prayer represents a proof of your love for God! You must accordingly prove it by your actions. This novena is therefore meant also to become for you in a time of earnest self-sanctification. Carry on a brave struggle against the defects in your character, discharge the duties of your vocation more conscientiously than ever, and say your daily prayers with even greater devotion. If possible attend Holy Mass and fervently receive Holy Communion every morning. Make every new day a time of penance and sacrifice. Do not indulge in self-pity and force yourself to make sacrifices that are hard on human nature. Zeal in doing penance and atoning for the sins of others puts real power behind your prayers. And then, when evening comes, make a spiritual pilgrimage to the Mother of Grace of Schoenstatt and offer your entire day's work for her "Treasury of Graces." Many of those that have called on Joseph Engling in their needs can testify that their prayers were answered even more readily after they had promised the Mother Thrice Admirable a sacrifice that implied much self-denial. And when you do receive the favor you have requested, do not forget a warm "Thank you!"

from Man Afire, a novena in honor of Mary, Mother Thrice Admirable and Queen of Schoenstatt

Also, the Immaculate Conception Novena begins today!

Giving Thanks

2011-11-24T07:50:00.001-06:00

Happy Thanksgiving!
It's been nice coming back home, even if just for a little bit. I was able to see my grandma yesterday and it was interesting just because she had such a blank face. I think she doesn't remember who I am, but I just have to wonder what's going on in her head after having nothing to do for a long time but sit in front of the moving picture box.

The house seemed a bit smaller walking down the hallway and things are cluttered as normal with my family. And like always my room has been filled with other peoples things, especially my desk. But it's nice that my room is being used. And of course Spot always running up to me and jumping at me.

I woke up pretty early this morning after just knocking out after dinner last night. Started looking at old awakening pl folders and it was nice just remembering some of the memories from the past couple years. I generally keep all the things/notes/letters I receive a particular semester in that semester's awakening folder. I found a few red envelopes with money I forgot about, a bunch of holy cards and things like that, and more novenas than I remember (to St. Thomas Aquinas, to the Holy Spirit, Divine Mercy Novena, to our Mother, Queen and Victress Thrice Admirable of Schoenstatt).

On that note I must mention the Immaculate Conception Novena, which begins next Wednesday the 30th (Since the Feast of the Immaculate Conception is December 8th, the day the novena ends on). In the library of the UCC, at 7PM every night there will be a short talk related to the Novena, and we'll pray it together then as well. (Don't forget the Perpetual Adoration going on during dead days!!)

There's good significance to Thanksgiving, historical and theological. Both are good articles to read.

Well time to go get prepared to give thanks! See you in the Eucharist!

Camino de Santiago de Compostela Updated

2011-11-19T12:33:00.001-06:00

As Will was randomly looking at ways to make the Camino de Santiago de Compostela, we came up with a few new places (though sadly it doesn't pass through Paris, but that's for another time).

View Larger Map

FA: Horchata

2011-11-17T09:00:00.000-06:00

This past weekend, after having horchata at Burrito Factory and El Taquito (near E. Riverside and 35, recommend the campechano taco) looked up the recipe and definitely had to make it (since it's not that hard).

For those of you who aren't familiar with horchata, it's a Mexican rice-cinnamon drink originally from Spain deriving its name from orxata, probably from the Valencian (Catalan, think Spanish with a French twist (but not Portugese) ordiata, made from ordi (barley, what it was made of there). Or, xata, drink of the Gods, etc. is great any time, thinned out with water and ice in the summer, warmer in the winter.

Some friends and I decided to make a double recipe with almond milk. So we got 5 cups of water hot added a couple cups of rice and a few short sticks of cinnanananamon and leave it over night (we started around noon so we left it about 9~10 hours) in the pot (since we don't have glass containers).

Thought we were smart getting large
bottles to keep it all in, but probably
not the best idea to put hot water in there.

After letting it sit, throw it in a blender (luckily Josh had one like those you see in Jamba Juice) until it's nice and smooth (or not). Strain out the grainy bits. This is where we had the most difficulty. Perhaps the blender was too good and we blended it too long. We didn't have any fine strainers (not colanders, but really fine strainers) and we tried using a clean shirt (as we don't have cheese cloths either) to strain it. We definitely got a lot of the grainyness out as you could see it, but it was so fine that it went through the shirt.

Then we added a cup and a half of sugar and blended it again (rather than adding the sugar and then straining it). And added a couple cups of almond milk we bought at the store. Aside from a bit of the fine grainyness, it came out really nicely. My friends didn't quite like how thick it was and added some more milk, water or almond milk to thin it out so it was more like the ones you find at BF or El Taquito. But without diluting it, it's a lot like eggnog (yum).

As we finished making the first batch, we decided to make a second batch. This time grinding the rice before letting it sit (according to various recipes online). We thusly added hot water and cinnamon and the next day found a super thick oatmeal like substance (which we believed if baked could be used for bricks). Next time, no hot water, maybe warm, maybe more water. Definitely tell yall if we find a good balance. Blend more to get the rice super fine, or blend it less so it'll be easier to strain through something..

You can see in the above picture the grainyness settling at the bottom, thought I imagine it won't be too bad to dilute it with some milk. In the mean time definitely want to have more.

On another note, I made a really bad hash the other day. I spiced the potatoes while I was cooking them, but didn't add any salt! It was still edible, but so bad without any flavor(Matt5:13). Should have time to make it again and redeem myself. And perhaps even Tortilla Española.

Indulgences for the Souls in Purgatory

2011-11-06T22:56:00.004-06:00

When this month began, I found out that November is the month dedicated to the souls in purgatory (for them to become saints!).

[And I just found out what each month's devotion is! January - the Holy name of Jesus, February - the Holy Family, March - St. Joseph, April - the Holy Spirit, May - The Blessed Virgin Mary, June - The Sacred Heart of Jesus, July - The Precious Blood of Jesus, August - The Immaculate Heart of Mary, September - Our Lady of Sorrows, October - Holy Rosary, November - Souls in Purgatory, December - Immaculate Conception. I'm surprised there's no month dedicated to God the Father, though March may be the closest.]

Domenico di Michelino, La Divina Commedia di Dante (Dante and the Divine Comedy)

Today, I found out there's a plenary indulgence for the souls in purgatory if in the first eight days of November (at first I thought I read nine, so I was thinking one could do a novena of these), you go to pray in a cemetery for the departed and do everything else typical of a plenary indulgence.

From the current Enchiridion of Indulgences:

13. Visit to a Cemetary (Coemeterii visitatio)

An indulgence, applicable only to the Souls in Purgatory, is granted to the faithful, who devoutly visit a cemetary and pray, even if only mentally, for the departed.

The indulgence is plenary each day from the 1st to the 8th of November; on the other days of the year it is partial.

Along with the visit and prayers at the cemetery:

1. Sacramental confession within "about twenty days"[1] of the actual day of the Plenary Indulgence.

2. Eucharistic Communion on the day of the Plenary Indulgence.

3. Prayer for the intentions of the Pope on the day of the Plenary Indulgence.

4. It is further required that all attachment to sin, even venial sin, be absent. [2]

[1] Apostolic Penitentiary, Prot. N. 39/05/I (18 February 2005).
[2] If the latter detachment from sin is in any way less than perfect or if the prescribed three conditions are not fulfilled, the indulgence will be partial only. In accordance with the canonical norms 34 and 35 of the Enchiridion of Indulgences (1968), a confessor or bishop can dispense someone of one or two of the norms above.

Such is quoted from Taylor Marshall's blog. In reference to the fourth listed element, check out Lindsay's blog.

So much for a novena of plenary indulgences, but there's still partial indulgences for the souls in purgatory. Something to consider. I think I will apply this indulgence on Tuesday for the souls of my grandfathers, the first priest I knew Fr. Francis Xavier Chang, S.J. who founded our mission, my possible younger sibling, and family and friends of my friends.

Who will you pray for?

FA: Chocolate Nutella Cookies, Hasselback Potatos, Roast Garlic

2011-11-06T22:14:00.001-06:00

As it gets colder, it's not so bad to use the oven! Overall though I haven't been cooking as much (though the other day I did make nice egg and hash with paprika and "Herb de Provence" courtesy of LA51 leftovers - a combination of dried rosemary, thyme, savory, basil, tarragon, marjoram leaf, lavender, basil and fennel seed.. It's a very nice combination)

I've been eyeing this recipe for Chocolate Nutella Cookies for a while. By the advice of Sarah of Average Betty, I double the amount of extracts. The cookies came out nicely, but definitely with an emphasis on the chocolate over the hazelnuttiness of Nutella. Also I don't have hazelnut extract and so replacing it with vanilla extract and doubling the total amount to four teaspoons didn't really help with the hazelnut flavor (next time if I don't have hazelnut extract, I'll probably used no or just a reduced amount of vanilla extract). I think the little bit at the end about smooshing the cookies with a cup is unnecessary. I still haven't gotten a cooling rack so I used a couple ice cube trays this time around. They came out nice and soft, even falling apart (I personally like firm and even crunchy cookies sometimes).

The solarize effect on my phone gives the cookies the right color in the picture (they looked black without any effect)

Hasselback Potato recipes have been popping up around (also on Average Betty) and I had some time and a hot oven, so I thought I'd try. I started making cuts into the potato one way at first and realized that they were done the other way, though that doesn't make too much of a difference (you could even do a cross cut that would make them like little fries, though that might be a little more difficult). I only used olive oil since it was easier to apply (and I was in a bit of a rush). Rushing, I left halfway before they finished (and before the roasted garlic finished as well) so I turned off the oven and just left them in there. They didn't turn out so crunchy. I'll have to do it again some time.

The Roast Garlic was something I wanted to try doing for quite a while now. Good for anything you would normally use garlic for (and even as a spread.. like on toast!). Nothing difficult about it, but again didn't roast it long enough. There were some cloves that weren't cut at the top because they weren't as long so I just cut them individually so they could be squeezed out. It wasn't difficult to squeeze out and wasn't as mushy as I imagined. Mostly they were whole cloves just not hard or crunchy like the raw version. Probably going to end up throwing it in just about everything I make (I really like garlic).

Are there any foods that you really like to cook/bake and eat?

Family Idolatry

2011-10-30T00:58:00.002-05:00

For those who love their family so much, this is hard medicine to swallow (particularly 7:35, but of course to more fully understand what he's saying you have to hear it in context to the whole video).

Overcoming the Pharisee in Ourselves

2011-10-27T18:21:00.001-05:00

"The meaning of redemption is not primarily to be without spot or stain"

Let me tell you what I feel so deeply with you and for you, but also with the people of today. I am of the opinion that on the whole we have a completely false concept of redemption. This is true not only of us, but also of our theologians and people in general. We have a completely false idea of redemption.

How do we like to see redemption? On other occasions I have used the contrasting expression of a "clean collar". We think that we are redeemed to the extent that we have a "clean collar". We think that the grace of redemption should free us from the struggle for our soul and our battle against sin. There is no bigger mistake we can make. Think for example, of people who strive seriously, but who are confused and entangled in their terrible passions. Whoever has looked into the hearts of such people knows how they strive to rise above themselves, and how a time eventually comes when they say: Well, if the God-Man is so little able to free me from my sins and faults, he must be a poor Redeemer.

The meaning of redemption is not, in the first place, being without spot and sin. What does God want? Why does he allow people to have deeply rooted passions, why does he let them fall repeatedly? What is the immediate meaning? God wants to uproot people from the soil of their own selves. People have to be pulled out of it. And God can usually only do this when he allows us to fall. That even includes people who have already reached the higher levels of a life of prayer. Human nature is so selfish and self-seeking, it is so infected by the plague of selfishness, that God repeatedly has to allow the "clean collar" to be dirtied. Otherwise we will never be completely uprooted. What does God want? Why does he let us fall, why does he allow powerful passions to explode within us from time to time? Only to redeem us fully.

True redemption includes, first of all, profound humility. Take, for example, people who suffer under habitual sin against the sixth commandment, self-gratification. Do you really believe that such people cannot become holy? If we can only be uprooted from the soil of self through constantly repeating sins and faults, then even- in the extreme case - serious sin can occur.

Let us apply this to ourselves. How many sins and faults can occur! We will never be free from them. God doesn't want it either. He can give us a "clean collar" to the extent that our nature has been uprooted and re-rooted in himself. Can you feel how false our concept of redemption is, and how we actually drive people away from Christ when they are struggling hard to reach him?

For example, I am faced with a boy or a girl who has terrible passions. Must I not tell myself: If I had such a disposition, wouldn't I be just the same? To whom do you owe your redemption? God. God does it. May I say: Because I have a relatively pure and noble nature, I don't have these battles? If I think in this way, I have not been redeemed. It is wrong to say: If I had such a disposition, I would be just the same. I should rather say: I would be much worse, seen not just in ascetical terms, but also in a moral-theological sense. It is not thanks to my nature that I do not have these passions. We are always looking for a way to indulge self.

If you have understood corretly what I am saying here rather clumsily, you will remain calm and at peace despite all your sinfulness and impulsiveness. You will then be able to say with inner feeling: Thank God I do such stupid things, not because they are stupid, but because I am humbled by these stupidities. God wants us to be small.

(...)

That is the meaning of redemption. We have to be uprooted, so that we can be re-rooted in God. If we only look into the dungeon of our unbridled nature, we will go mad. People today cannot cope with this. So the process of being uprooted has to go hand in hand with the process of being re-rooted otherwise we will develop an inferiority complex, a morbid feeling of guilt. That would be wrong. At the same time we must be rooted in God through boundless trust. That is such a profound insight. It is true holiness. That is God's will. He does not want my "clean collar", he wants me to become deeply humble and to give myself to him with boundless trust.

With that I have really answered a whole host of questions you have raised, or have not yet expressed. If my temperament is still so rebellious and spontaneous, must my special resolution (particular examination) be: I will be more balanced? The first question is : Is that a virtue? Does God really want me to be so balanced? He enjoys it when the stars are different and when the flowers vary in their beauty. Even if he wants this balance, he doesn't want it just yet. He wants, first of all, not that I should be without spot, but that I should become more humble.

What I have just said differs radically from what we usually hear. You may ask: May we tell people in general about this? Of course! Does it mean that we are allowed to sin? No. We do so anyhow, we do stupid things. My constant objective is that we should see things clearly and show people these things correctly. The first thing is humility. Think of all we have discussed privately in these days. How greatly you suffer under yourselves. Thank God for it! It is obvious that our natural desire is to be pure. That is healthy. Our longing is for a little bit of paradise. But because our nature is not pure, we may not think that God does not love us. He loves us so much, that is why he allows us to suffer in this way. Here we have the true, Christian ideal of human nature.

Let me repeat: we will gradually acquire a "clean collar", not because we want to have one, but because God will give it to us once we want to become little children before him. Indeed, our childlikeness should heal our completely distorted way of thinking and feeling. Do you believe that this is possible? If God makes you really little, you will one day see how sound you will have become in your thinking and feeling. The you will not constantly say: God have mercy on me, poor sinner! I know exactly what I need to ask for.

Some people think that in order to be humble they have to be abnormal, they may not go through life looking joyful and vivacious. They are mistaken. I presuppose that you know that humility is truthfulness. Think about it and pray for a clear understanding. You will then see how you will become inwardly free. We will then also see how Gods' grace is upholding us, and we will make use of the battles and difficulties facing us as the best possible means of reaching God's embrace. He will manage it, he will do it. We cannot. We must become aware of being a member of the Mystical Body. Christ lives in me. He does it in me. I repeat: Every form of holiness, as well as every form of childlikeness, must one day acquire this attitude. We can say that our holiness will include this form of distinctive childlikeness to the extent that we strive for childlike holiness. A child plays before God. This does not mean that such a person is not hard at work as well. Of course they are, but it is not the main thing. We take the hard battles and striving for granted.God achieves the success in me, Christ does it in me.

Now let us extend these thoughts somewhat, interpreting and applying them. Allow me to point to St Therese of the Child Jesus. I am aware that in the way it is often described St Therese's type of holiness doe not appeal to our German taste in such things. It is also true that men and priests often think when they hear such things that the Little Way is something for women! They think that all it requires is that we simply do nothing. They are mistaken. Holiness is not quietism. That is impossible. You should always hear this truth: The Little Way does not look at its own achievements.

-Father Joseph Kentenich

Camino de Santiago de Compostela

2011-10-27T04:17:00.000-05:00

View Larger Map

So, who's interested in doing this?

10,000 “Impossible” Novenas to St. Jude!

2011-10-19T17:11:00.002-05:00

Starting today, I am joining over 5,000 Catholics to pray the St. Jude Novena!

I’m looking forward to the answered prayers from this amazing saint! With so many faithful Catholics around the world praying this novena, I thought you’d like to join too!

Do you have any ‘impossible causes’ to pray for?

You can sign up for handy email reminders to get the the novena prayers here: St. Jude Novena

Now that you’ve signed up, I’d like you ask you a little favor. We are trying to get 10,000 people to pray this novena together. Right now, there are about 5,200 signed up. Will you help me get more?

Here’s what you can do:

+ Go to the Facebook event here and invite all your Catholic friends.
+ If you have a website, post about it there!
+ Email your friends and family and get them praying too!

Let’s get all the Catholics we know to pray this novena together to St. Jude!

50 Tips Based on Stories

2011-10-13T08:00:00.000-05:00

Photo cred: NASA/Kim Shiflett

Last year, Jim Kennedy, the former director of the Kennedy Space Center in Florida came to UT and gave a short talk of different tips that he's picked up over the years. Now all these tips are based on stories from his life (or stories he's heard). I have this idea that "it's all about the story." Now I haven't developed it much yet, but when I have more and when I have the time to write it all down, you will hear (or see) about it.

He was also on a panel a little later that week where the topic was "Things you won't learn in engineering school". I recorded a bit of what he said (well like almost all) and I have it over on my youtube page. Here's a link to all the videos: http://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLB4CCD103DF286AF9&feature=viewall

He also left us with a sheet with all the tips as he didn't have enough time to talk about all of them.

Lessons in Life and Leadership
(As Inspired by True Stories of Life at NASA)
Tip # 1 Treat Everyone with Dignity and Respect
Tip # 2 Cherish Diversity
Tip # 3 Act With Integrity
Tip # 4 Praise in Public, Criticize in Private
Tip # 5 Go the Extra Mile (Human Lecture)

Tip # 6 Exploit Your Intellectual Curiosity

Tip # 7 Don't Be Afraid of Failure

Tip # 8 Follow Your Passion
Tip # 9 Be Thoughtful of Others (Overview Lecture)

Tip # 10 Be Proud of Who You Are

Tip # 11 Have the Courage of Your Convictions
Tip # 12 Pause to Celebrate Your Accomplishments
Tip # 13 Change is NOT a Bad Thing (Overview Lecture)

Tip #14 The Harder You Work, The Luckier You Get (Robotic Lecture) [- Sounds like Capital of Grace]
Tip # 15 Keep a Sense of Humor

Tip # 16 Things Are Not Always What They Appear To Be
Tip # 17 Out of Tragedy Comes Triumph
Tip # 18 Life Is Complicated....Practice KISS'ing

Tip # 19 Ships In Harbor Are Safe, But That's Not What Ships Are For
Tip # 20 Keep Your Friends Close... And Your Enemies Closer
Tip # 21 Shoot For The Moon; Even If You Miss You'll Be Among The Stars
Tip # 22 Get Inspired By a Young Person
Tip # 23 The World Is a Beautiful Place, Just Look For It

Tip # 24 I Will Prepare For Some Day My Chance Will Come
Tip # 25 If At First You Don't Succeed, Try Harder
Tip # 26 YOU Can Make A Difference
Tip # 27 Teachers Rock Tip # 28 Have Fun

Tip # 29 Find Some Alone Time (We All Need Our Space)
Tip # 30 Teamwork Makes the Team Work
Tip # 31 Invest In Friendships... The Have a Great ROI

Tip # 32 LOL...Even At Yourself
Tip # 33 Take Time to Mentor...It's Not a Trivial Pursuit (Shuttle Lecture)
Tip # 34 Keep That Gleam in Your Eyes
Tip # 35 For Key Decisions Get a Second Opinion
Tip # 36 It's a Grand Old Flag... Honor It
Tip # 37 Strive To Be Truly Great
Tip # 38 Take Pride in Your Organization
Tip # 39 Make Beautiful Music.....In Your Own Special Way
Tip # 40 It's OK to Have Some Heroes
Tip # 41 Have a Plan... And a Back-Up Plan
Tip # 42 Be Safe
Tip # 43 Success Is Not Always Rewarded Fairly... Live With It (ISS Lecture)
Tip # 44 When Things Go Wrong... Stay Cool
Tip # 45 Set Your Goals and Don't Stop Until You've Achieved Them
Tip # 46 Make Good Choices (Cx Lecture)
Tip # 47 Life has It's Ups and Downs... Enjoy The Ride
Tip # 48 Do Your Part to Protect the Planet
Tip # 49 Commit To Be Fit
Tip # 50 Get Your Tips from Reliable Sources
Tip # 51 Sometimes you just gotta "kick a little as..teroid"

Tip # 52 Focus On Abilities, NOT Disabilities (Remember "A Blind Man Named Jim")

Jim and Bernie Kennedy
Retired NASA
3740 Ocean Beach Blvd #702
Cocoa Beach, Fl 32931
(321) 784-6975
(321) 720-8410 (Jim's Cell)
(321) 720-8483 (Bernie's Cell)

Hope you find some of these useful and humorous.

FA: Fresh Pasta

2011-10-11T22:06:00.000-05:00

Before I shared that it was easy to make pasta. Now I'm making it!

Kneaded dough resting

Now the recipe from Mario Batali that I linked is for four servings, but I only made one. I used 1 egg and a little less than a cup of flour. Just waz it up in a food processor if you have one. I don't so I just mixed it with a fork and then by hand. I also don't have a pasta machine/roller so I just made it as flat as I could before cutting it up.

The dough didn't come out super thin like it would have if it was rolled through a pasta machine so it took around 2 minutes to cook rather than the minute that Jamie said. However, because of the thickness, it's not going to be like the pasta that you buy (that is cut them thinner!!).

It wasn't thin when I flattened it (the picture above isn't how flat it was, I got it to about the size of the plate when it was flat). Next time I intend to make the pasta thinner before I cut it and cut it thinner that I cut it this time.

The results were still tasty though.

Ripped Up

2011-10-11T12:31:00.001-05:00

This weekend, I was at a retreat. For the most part, there want anything new.

The only one part that threw me off for a second was... let me explain. Toward the beginning of the weekend, we were asked to draw our plans in life, even the little bit of maybe that we had no idea about. All the drawings were put together and people were asked to share about their dreams.

After a few people shared, they ripped up the drawings. At first it surprised me, but it wasn't lasting. The things I drew on there I was mostly unsure of and wasn't particularly sad or shocked that they might change.

However, as I woke up, half way into the semester, late to the same tuesday class where we turned in homework, I realized that I could fail this class and probably others too. And by extension, not finish college. This brought the whole pain/loss into a new light. What if I fail college? What if I end up not being able to find a job?

Would I still be secure in God? Would I go insane? Could I truthfully tell myself that I did my best?

CW: 依然

2011-10-09T19:31:00.001-05:00

依然
Yīrán - still. I'm not completely sure what the context of word would be. I've never heard it before today. I always use "还在"(Hái zài) because that's what I know. And perhaps that's how a child says it.

I found the word from this music video that WongFu made:

Back in my junior or senior year, I was in the older Chinese (Saturday school) class. I think you could just say that it was the lazy persons class and was more conversational. One of the ways that we learned was through popular Chinese songs. Two songs that I liked and remember are 老鼠爱大米 (Lǎoshǔ ài dàmǐ - Mice love rice - an interesting english rendition) and 听妈妈的话 (Tīng māmā dehuà - Listen to mother's words). With some more listening and understanding, they'll help me to remember more words.

FA: Pasta Magherita & stuff

2011-10-05T08:00:00.000-05:00

I also made a magherita pasta for a cook staff bonding (for longhorn awakening- you should go!). Basically tomatoes, onions, garlic, fresh mozzarella and basil. The recipe basically tells you to cook the pasta and in the mean time cook up the tomatoes, onion garlic, and then mix everything together. However being as it was a pot luck and I wasn't serving it right as I was finished making it, I added everything and the fresh mozzarella melted and stuck to the tomato pieces. Wasn't very appetizing. I like this recipe better. Sure looks a lot better.

ps. fresh pasta is so easy!

But on the subject of desserts and sweet things, I found a simple recipe for mango frozen yogurt. And when I say simple, I mean really easy!

If you go to 6:50, that's where he begins. And you can do it with any frozen fruit! Right now I'm thinking blueberries and nutella. mmmm

Want a nice drink? 5:32. Again with lots of options based on what fruit you want to use.

Bring that last episode back a bit and watch the first part and he'll be talking about making this nice chowder with prawns, corn, potatoes, and smoked haddock. My friend, Jing, posted about a chowder that she made a while ago that was just really appetizing and got me wanting to make some.

Also a while back at a nice HEB, they had some samples of a cacciatore cassarole they had the ingredients and recipe for. It had raviolis, fresh mozzarella, and some pre-made cacciatore sauce. I had some of the sauce with the mozzarella and it was so rich. Definitely want to try making some sort of cacciatore dish.

A short article to read and think about. Cooking really is fun!

[logo via MyCatholicVoice.com]

Last but not least, I want to feature the Catholic Foodie- "Where food meets faith!" This Louisiana bro has lots of good recipes, podcasts, a column called "Mary in the Kitchen", and they just revamped their website.

The podcasts are around 30 minutes and are plenty entertaining and engaging (that is if you like food and faith).

FA: Arroz con Picadillo

2011-10-04T08:00:00.000-05:00

Spanish rice and Picadillo still cooking

Para la dia de Independencia de Mexico a while back, I hung out with some friends from CFC and we made spanish rice and picadillo. They turned out pretty well. Thanks so much for the recipes Sarah!

Spanish Rice

1 cup white (long grain) rice
1 can of tomatoes (8-10 oz)
2 cups of water
1~2 tbs of caldo de tomate
onion powder (about a tbs or less, or half an onion chopped)
garlic powder (according to your taste, 1 tbs for me)

Brown the rice (with chopped onions) in some oil (a few minutes). Then add the rest of the ingredients, bring to a boil and then let simmer covered on medium low heat for around 20 minutes.

Picadillo

1 lb. ground beef
2-3 potatoes, cubed about 1 inch
1.5 cans of tomatoes (12-14 oz)
water
onion powder
garlic powder
fajita seasoning
caldo de tomate

Brown the ground beef with onion powder, garlic powder, and fajita seasoning. Add the potatoes and add just enough water to cover the potatoes. Add caldo de tomate to taste. Cook on medium until potatoes are fork tender stirring occasionally.

All in all, with some corn torillas and sour cream, it was a pretty good dinner to have with friends. They also baked some muffins!

It all reminds me of arroz con leche.. and paella!

Again, thanks Sarah!

Food Adventures: Cookies!

2011-10-03T08:00:00.000-05:00

As I mentioned before, I've been making cookies! Yay

I'm sure you can find a chocolate cookie recipe, but this is from the cook book we have.

The first time I made them, I made them fairly big. And then I realized that I don't have a wire rack (still don't). As you can guess (or google) , it cools baked goods evenly, prevents over baking, and prevents condensation (ew soggy food). So I ended up using chopsticks over a baking pan as a makeshift/mcgyver style wire rack. Those that I couldn't fit, I just put them on the edge of a plate.

The second batch I made, I made lots smaller. I used the second "half" of the bag of chocolate chips, but it was way too much. It seemed like some of the cookies would turn into blobs of melted chocolate. They didn't. However for some reason the chocolate, even after the cookies are cool, is still.... melty..for lack of a better word. And almost gone.

For my next couple of batches of cookies, I want to make chocolate nutella cookies (missing the baking powder and "Dutch-process unsweeted cocoa powder") and brown sugar cookies (missing the ground cinnananananmon and ginger). Should be good.

La Petite Fleur

2011-09-22T00:00:00.001-05:00

[Photo via the Little Flower Parish]

En neuf jours, c'est le jour de Sainte Thérèse.
And I think that's effectively my limit avec français pour dit que je veux dire.

Anyway with it being nine days before her feast (la fête -the party, didn't expect it to be used for feast too but apparently in french the accent circonflexe represents the former presence of a consonant, typically 's') , today begins the novena (originating from noven, latin for nine) for her intercession.

Last semester, I found a pretty awesome site called praymorenovenas.com that sends out emails reminding about when certain novenas of general devotion. This is the link to the St. Therese novena. As always there's lots to learn about the history of a certain tradition.

Just for clarification, as far as I know, novenas begin nine days before a certain feast or occasion. That is they end the day before said fête.

Saint Therese, even though she wasn't particularly well known and didn't do any big missions on her own, is a Doctor of the Church by her example. I really suggest reading (or listening) to her autobiography, L'Histoire d'une Âme (The Story of a Soul). It's quite good. You see her childhood and how important her father and mother, Louis et Zélie Martin, were in her life and in her growth and all the pains she experienced. (Also Louis et Zélie Martin are one of the few couples ever beatified!)

One day, I'd love to go to Lisieux, as well as Lourdes. But that day will have to wait.

In the mean time, I hope this novena helps you grow closer to St. Therese and the Child Jesus!

Do you have any devotions to Jesus in a particular way or to Saints?

Fruit Stock?

2011-09-18T02:19:00.000-05:00

So the other day, as I was writing the post about sacrifice, in between classes I was having lunch, an apple. Just at the second level of the UTC finishing my apple before class starts, I was considering throwing the core into bushes the level below. The conservationist/green inside me said it was fine, but the boy scout in me decided that it wasn't good to litter and it wouldn't have had a good image or impression/example for others around me.

UTC of the Forty Acres if you've never seen. [Map courtesy of UT]

"Why not keep it for compost?" Ah but we don't have a compost bin or anywhere to keep the compost or even use it. "So then why not save it for a stock?" Wait is there such a thing as a fruit stock?.... (And as of now I don't even know if there's such a thing, but perhaps I'll be the first to make it?)

Of course I was reminded of this video by Working Class Foodies. A short about them: Working Class Foodies follows siblings Rebecca and Max Lando - and their dog, Humphrey - on their quest to find the best local and seasonal ingredients the city has to offer, and turn them into delicious meals - all while keeping the budget under $6/person.

$6/person. Sounds good right?

In this short episode of WCFoodies, they show how they like to stock their kitchen as well as how to make vegetable and soup stock. I'd love to stock my kitchen as well as they have, but seeing as I've only started my collection just moving off campus this year and actually having a kitchen, I'll take it slow. Especially since I'm not sure when I'll be living in one place for a good while. Or when I'll need to have my own kitchen equipment. For now I'll be fine sharing with my roommates what I have as well as what they have.

As for stock, one thing they didn't mention about vegetable stock is that cabbages (including broccoli and cauliflower), tomatoes, and (some people say) asparagus overpower the stock and shouldn't be included (or just small amounts in the case of tomatoes).

But what's the difference between stock and broth? I'll let wikipedia explain that one:

"The difference between broth and stock is one of both cultural and colloquial terminology but certain definitions prevail. Stock is the thin liquid produced by simmering raw ingredients: solids are removed, leaving a thin, highly-flavoured liquid. This gives classic stock as made from beef, veal, chicken, fish and vegetable stock.

Broth differs in that it is a basic soup where the solid pieces of flavouring meat or fish, along with some vegetables, remain. It is often made more substantial by adding starches such as rice, barley or pulses."

In this particular episode, Rebecca recommends a couple sites for various reasons. I think now would be a good time to note them. As for the rest of their recipes, there are a few that I want to make such as Gazpacho, of which I first had this summer in Madrid, and a Peach(&Blueberry) Cobbler.

As of now, my favorite episode, here it is. Not only does it intrigue me to make my own ketchup and experiment making different kinds and flavors, but also it explains a little more of why actually making things on your own is better. (Jamie Oliver, of the Food Revolution and the Naked Chef, says some in one of his Food Revolution episodes where he visits an elementary school and asks the kids what some vegetables are and some questions like where do foods come from. And sadly they don't know. )

"Now it's a fair question to wonder why you would spend the time making your own condiments when you can just go to the store and pick them up for super cheap. Well first of all, making your own condiments means that you control what goes into them. We used all natural ingredients; there's no corn syrup, no corn starch, no artificial preservatives, no fake color. And on top of that once you've made your first batch, you can really play with these. Why not try a curry ketchup? An old bay ketchup? Maybe a hot sauce ketchup. You can really control the flavor. You can make it taste saltier or sweeter, more onion-y, more garlic-y, more tomato-y. Totally up to you."

One day I'd like to have such a mastery of some good number of ingredients and recipes to make whatever based on what is around in the pantry and kitchen.

Later, I'd still like to say a little about Mid-Autumn Festival and Moon cakes, cookies, y picadillo y arroz espanol.

Can you tell how much I love food and cooking? Perhaps over this year I'll start to develop a similar love to baking.

In the meantime I should sleep so I can go to Covenant Mass!

Failure to Sacrifice

2011-09-15T22:26:00.000-05:00

This morning after waking up late (after sleeping late), I saw on twitter that a friend of mine, Michael, who's at GTech was having difficulty with this one particular programming class. After finding out that it's an 8am class and that he'd already fallen behind and was considering dropping the class after his test on Monday (St. Joseph of Cupertino, OPN), I thought about sacrifice. Just about how sacrifice leads to fruit (as opposed to sacrifice only preceding fruit).

It just reminded me about this: "if we can't make the small sacrifices today, how will we make the big sacrifices tomorrow?"
Also about an article I read last night "what we do today, makes who we are tomorrow."

So I decided that as a sacrifice to doing well in school and other intentions, I would pay complete attention in class today (as well as to make up got being late to class -_-). It was so much harder to do than I remember!

Even with the nicest teacher in a class I've taken before, it's still difficult to stay awake or pay attention to class with how much abstraction there is. Don't get me wrong, this is the rigor that is behind the prestige of an engineering degree from UT.

And maybe it's just me, but that seemed like the most difficult thing I've tried to in a long time. Just goes to show how long of a way I have to go. I mean thinking of Joseph Engling, he had an entire list of sacrifices he would make daily which he used to keep him self in check for love of the Lord.

"Joseph Engling's first tally sheet for "contributions to the capital of grace of our Mater Ter Admirabilis", which runs from August 22 to September 6, 1915. Items listed include punctual rising, Holy Mass, apostolic activity, and night prayer (source: ENGLING B&T, p.124)." From New Vision From Life

The providential appropriateness of this realization on this day is apparent, between the exultation of the Cross yesterday, the feast of Our Lady of Sorrows today, today being the death anniversary of Fr. Kentenich († 15 September 1968), and my 5th day of this particular novena dealing specifically with sacrifice.

In a single day of experience among this and other things that happened today, I am beginning to see how much sacrifice is necessary of me. This will be a trying, but hopefully fruitful year.

Fifth Day

Transformed by Sacrifice

The idea of planning, work and production often has an hypnotic effect on us. Our society is motivated by the theory of constant progress. And yet there are still numerous occurences that remain incomprehensible to us - failures, sickness, catastrophes, human inability. We can expect suffering - great suffering. We have to make sacrifices - many sacrifices.

We look at Schoenstatt's Founder

He is standing at the altar of the shrine in which he offered up Holy Mass every morning during the fourteen years of his exile. He is offering the Eternal Father the chalice containing the Precious Blood of his Son. Accept, receive, Holy Father. His chalice is filled to the brim with accusations, calumnies, and the sentence of separation from his incomplete work. Each day of those fourteen years had to be lived, suffered and mastered. Fourteen years is a long time for a ma who was exiled from his foundation at the age of sixty-six, after having spent all his time and strength in its service for forty years, and after suffering for three and a half years in a concentration camp on its behalf.

An official of the Roman Curia who visited him in Milwaukee expected to meet a spiritually broken and embittered man in need of consolation. He was amazed to find one who spent all his time helping to uplift others.

Each morning he offered his chalice of suffering to the Father in the sacrifice of Christ. Accept, receive, Holy Father. Of course it was difficult, but he accepted every sacrifice gratefully as a special gift from Eternal Love who considered him worthy to be made like his suffering and crucified Son. Christ redeemed the world not by his preaching, or because people followed him enthusiastically, but by his obedience to the Father in his suffering when he died the death of a criminal. Our suffering becomes precious when it is offered up in the chalice with that of the Saviour: Accept, receive, Holy Father.

We consider: What is my attitude to suffering? Do I try to get rid of it as a burdensome evil, or do I try to accept it gratefully and bear it bravely as my contribution to my own salvation and that of the world?

We pray with Father Kentenich

Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ, there is nothing that we so dislike as sufferin, any suffering. We have been created for happiness, so why must we suffer? Lord, every suffering casts us down. It shows us what we really are - limited, helpless and dependent beings. We find it difficult to accept suffering is an opportunity to become a child in you, to be formed and transformed into your image and likeness, you who are the Child of the Father in whom we became children of the Father. Help me to accept each suffering joyfully and gratefully, without keeping rigidly to my personal idea of happiness. Help me to make my suffering a real sacrifice, a gift to the Father - for many. Amen

Mother, transform me!

Fresh Start+"Chicken with Pan Sauce"

2011-09-12T02:07:00.001-05:00

So just as tonight was supposed to be more productive (not that it wasn't, but I did everything I wanted to do much slower that I thought I would. and now it's 1am! and I didn't get around to starting homework before the day it was due... whups), I haven't really been putting much up on this blog sadly. Over the past year, I've had so many ideas about what to post, but it seems like even though I've had these ideas, when I actually sit down to write them, I don't actually have much to say. My idea of a blog post just turns into an idea for a short blurb.

None the less, I'd like to continue with the different foreign words that I learn and want to learn(tambien, I think I will throw in des mots from different languages. hopefully you'll pick up on them too and increase your random vocabulary so you can speak in multiple languages at the same time!) . Also, as I have the chance to cook a lot more often (and make cookies too!), I'd like to keep some sort of record of what I've made and how successful it's been, or perhaps way's to improve.

Just to get started again with this, I'd like to just go over a bit of what I did tonight. Over this weekend, I had the fortune to make it to a branch retreat with SUM and a big focus, though unintentional was the grace of home and being that grace of home to others. As of now, things have always been difficult for me in the way of friendships and bonds. It's always difficult for me to get myself to reach out to others and do things other than anything that's planned by some group I'm involved in or some other required task that I work on with others. From now on, I really want to risk more of myself and my security to deepen my friendships!

As I got back, I was thinking more and more about blogs and just how much fun I've had in the past reading other people's blogs and making my own and writing on it. Even just little blurbs about cute kids, and random people online who have interesting and funny things to say (y que gustan de las cosas gratis tambien [ok that was gt, sue me] I totally would have given that jewelry to someone if I had the chance to enter). Sometimes I even stumble upon blogs that I think are friends, but end up being someone who speaks or just writes portuguese... (pero en serio, does anyone know who this is?)

Honestly I really like engineering and organic things, though those two don't exactly always go hand in hand. But here they do! (Though I don't think I like the grassy ones or the mushroom one too much, but the other ones are pretty awesome. Maybe I'll grow a pooktre chair one day. Of course the biggest down side is the time, but if you want something that's sturdy and made of one solid piece of wood, this seems like the way to do it.).

Also tonight I made "Chicken with Pan Sauce" thanks to a cook book my roommates got before I was around (which I quite like)

Ze Recipe, s'il te plait

It wasn't particularly difficult, though I am missing black pepper (something that should have been on the shopping list a long time ago). Also didn't have any foil to keep, though I just used two of the same type of plates to keep them. It wasn't bad, though the juices from the chicken came out and made the chicken a bit dry by serving time. Tambien, I should have done a better job at pounding the chicken evenly. I think next time I make this, I'll reintroduce the chicken to the sauce (what kind of sauce would you call this? a reduction? a buerre blanc?) so that it isn't so dry and so the chicken gets more of the flavor of the sauce as well. And the onions need to be chopped a lot more finely next time, and perhaps less than half and onion is enough. Ah though we need more wine if I'm going to make it!

At any rate, this is how it turned out. And it was quite enjoyable. Rice or some sort of starch would have been a nice addition.

And soon enough (after we go grocery shopping), we'll have a constant store of cookies! Hopefully there won't be too many cookie monsters eating them quickly, but we'll be trying to make many different kinds of cookies to welcome those who are visiting *ahem*.

Maybe by some crazy chance, I'll make moon cakes! in celebration of the mid autumn festival, custom to Asian cultures. (maybe I'll post a bit about that when I learn more).

One a friend's mom made with their family name

Y just so that we all have better track of what's coming in the future:
- more cooking experiences
- language lessons
- a post relating to this question?
- personality/temperament tests and results/thoughs
- continuation of the thirty week challenge
and assuming that I took good enough notes to carry out old posts that I had ideas about
- Friday
- (against) Compartmentalization
- Intense Suffering
- Relationships
- The Mass Person
- 50 Tips based on Stories
- "It's all about the Story"
- Patience

I don't intend to spit out 10 blog posts in a week, but maybe that much in a couple months? or even more often. Just so I don't burn myself out :P

2011-09-05T20:14:00.002-05:00

"Do you want to come to believe but do not know the way? Learn from those who were tormented by doubts before you. Imitate their way of acting, do everything that the faith requires, as though you were already a believer. Attend Mass, use holy water and so on. That will no doubt make you simple and lead you to faith." - Blaise Pascal (1588-1651)

The first reason is because we have become negligent in our own spiritual exercises (eg. prayer, Mass, the Sacrament of Reconciliation), and through our faults, spiritual consolation withdraws from us. The second is that God tries us to see how much we extend ourselves to serve and praise him without a sense of his grace or consolation. The third is to help us feel and understand that spiritual consolations are graces from God, and not due to our own striving, lest we become prideful and attribute them to ourselves. -Christine Watkins

July 19, 1921
Dear Fritz!
A kind of flu kept me from writing sooner. Now that I have put it behind me, let me speak about your intentions as a late nameday gift to you.
God has taken you into the high school of suffering, both physical and spiritual. What your soul is going through is totally normal. The dryness and the dark night which you experience is meant to free you from yourself. The more quickly and unselfishly you let this take place, the greater your progress will be on the way to sanctity. Hence, 'Your will be done...'
Your prayer life must also take this more into account. For now your prayer must place less emphasis on your own activity; you must rather be more passive: Dear God, here I kneel; I am too miserable to talk with you, so I want to at least honor you with my presence. Speak, Lord, your servant is listening. (...)
Regarding your question about the future, let me only give you this answer for now: Mater habebit curam. If you have the strength to write a little biography about our dear Joseph Engligh, you would be doing a service to many people.
Your poor mother! She has a difficult path of suffering. Greet her from me.
You do the Apostolic Movement the greatest service through holy suffering. I therefor ask you: contribute to the capital of grace of the MTA!
Perhaps we will see each other when you return home. Until then, a good recovery and heartfelt greetings! I pray for you. With my priestly blessing in sincere love,
(signed) J. Kentenich

Come and Gone

2011-08-28T19:28:00.001-05:00

Another summer, another weekend, another birthday, all come and gone. Not that I cared much. But I'm just ready to not be sick and to be able to eat and do other things as I normally would. Right now apple sauce is just about the only thing I can stomach.

Aeropuerto de Madrid-Barajas

2011-08-25T01:59:00.000-05:00

¡Just waiting at the Madrid-Barajas Airport! Boarding was supposed to start 30 minutes ago and the flight´s supposed to leave in 5 minutes, but we had a change in gate so I assume that´s what´s taking so long.

¡And I got a small paella pan! Thát´ll be fun to use

"Resting"

2011-08-23T19:37:00.001-05:00

The cucharon has become the cucharita

Once again I'm using the internets in the basement of the Serrano Shrine. So far five of the twelve of us have departed. And at the end of tomorrow only two of us will remain.

So much has gone on during this pilgrimage and even this summer, I'm not sure I'll get the chance to say everything.
This whole year will be crazy: moving in to an apartment with friends off campus, working harder for better grades, being with friends-catching up and getting closer with friends.

Already, I feel like all my weekends for the first month or so are taken up. And I'm not even sure I'll be staffing awakening.

Soon I'll be back in houston getting ready to make up for the syllabi I missed. And soon this year will start (actually in 15 hours) and this will be quite an interesting one.

And these last few days without structure or specific program have been nice to just be with the guys.

Well, here comes the last day in madrid!

Jota me jota

2011-08-18T15:07:00.001-05:00

So I pretty much ran off to europe without saying anything. But things have been so hectic, I hope that you can forgive me.

I just saw the pope here in Madrid and am at the Serrano Schoenstatt Shrine on my phone. Theres supposed to be mass right now, but with spanish/other culture nothing has been on time.

The time here in europe has been super packed just visiting every where. Theres barely been enough time to sleep and it's just crazy trying to remember everyone's names.

Hopefully the day's after WYD is officially over so I can get some rest before starting school late haha.

Hope everyone has been well back home and I will update later when I get home or have internet. (hopefully I'll have the time just to write things down in my journal!) See you all soon (for those who actually read this haha)

Chinese Word: 夜貓子

2011-07-25T01:11:00.004-05:00

This evening's word is: 夜猫子

My mom was commenting earlier how my aunt and cousin can stay up late, that they were "night cat"s. "夜猫子" - Yè māo zi.
夜 - night
猫子 (or just 猫) - cat.

an owl my sister drew

As she was explaining the word to me, I wondered if "猫" was for owl or cat because owl is "貓頭鷹" - māo tóu yīng, which literally translates to cat head eagle (you know since an owl has big eyes like a cat? maybe haha).

Right as my mom was telling me about this a cat crossed the road right in front of her car. She slowed down to let it past, but that's not what happened this morning haha. First time I ever experienced a car hitting a pidgeon.

Chinese Word: 皮蛋豆腐

2011-07-23T22:11:00.000-05:00

Starting it all off with some of what I had for dinner:

皮蛋豆腐.

Pronounced "Pí dàn dòu fu", it literally translates to "skin/leather egg tofu."

In English, it is Century/Thousand Year old/Preserved Egg Tofu. And its made of... you guessed it: 軟豆腐 (Ruǎn dòufu - Soft Tofu), 皮蛋 (Thousand year old egg), 蔥 (Cōng - Scallions/Green Onions), 醬油(Jiàngyóu - soy sauce), 和(Hé- and)香油 (xiāngyóu-sesame oil).

Some recipes also have 肉松 (ròu sōng - pork sung. there isn't much of an English word for it and somehow pork floss doesn't make it sound the most appetizing).

[photo found here]

The picture above is it already mixed and almost gone, but if you get it at a restaurant, it may look more like this:

It's best served chilled and eaten fresh. Being mostly made of tofu, it has a light flavor and I think it's great with rice. Nothing too complicated.

Also I think I've found a goldmine of L'Angelus. I didn't know there was so much of them on youtube!

And a new great song!

Learning and Retaining Languages

2011-07-23T22:06:00.000-05:00

Over the years, I've come into contact with plenty of languages. For the most part, I've lived with three: English from living in the US, Chinese from my heritage and family, and French from school.

(I've also come across: Spanish from the heritage of the land and so many people taking it from school [and shall I mention foreigners], Portuguese from going to Brazil to visit family, Latin from the Catholic Church, and plenty others from people studying them. They're all so interesting!)

And I've never been particularly good with any of them. Of course English is the most natural because of it's frequency of use. And lack of use shows in any other language I may have learned. French, I can dabble in a bit and it's easier than to write, read, or orally understand it (I would hope so after taking it for six years). And lastly Chinese which learned from life and from Chinese school (though I barely payed attention any of the Saturdays I went).

Of course outside of the universally understood language of the country, I would hope that the language so intertwined with my heritage would be more intertwined with my own being. Refusing to pay attention in class didn't do good. And now that I am away from the only consistent source of Chinese nine of the 12 months of the year, any grasp of the language has loosened. And it's been quite noticeable over the past two years.

Being at home for the summer has been a good help in combating that loosening grip. But soon, if I don't take the learning and mastery into my own hands, three months every year for 2 more years won't do me any good.

Also, just hearing more about language from people travelling abroad or from people's experiences (e.g. a Chinese customer being reprimanded by an elder Chinese man for not being able to order in his "native" language) has made me more aware of how important language is to culture and people. I would hate to lose the language I first learned disappear completely and lack the ability to share and experience it with others.

To take this learning into my own hands, I've decided to incorporate this into my blog, which I've tried to make an extension of myself and my thoughts. (I can't believe that it took two months to think of this, and now that I'm home for only another 1.5 weeks, I haven't taken much advantage of my roots.)

Through this learning experience, I'll be using google translate (of course), and perhaps an online lesson plan of some sort (This dictionary also seems like it will be a good help).

I'll also be picking up little bits of other languages too here and there. Especially in the coming month as I'll be in Germany and Spain! It'll be my first trip to Europe, but it won't be my last. I'm definitely going to France one day. I'm not sure how often I'll be able to update this blog while I'm over there, but I'll take plenty of pictures and keep a journal of all the adventures over there!

As I attempt to think of the origin of my liking of languages, I think of a story I vaguely remember, though I cannot remember the source or many details of it. The story goes that a boy wants to do great things and asks someone elder what they should do to achieve greatness. He is told to learn languages. And that is all I remember of the story. Trying to find such a story, I stumbled upon this video:

(if only there was more film of Fr. Kentenich!)

I will assume that even with the dawn of the internet, such things must be learned. But regardless, I think it'd be quite amusing and fun to mix and match languages when speaking or writing. It'd be useful for making your own code! And also words in some languages don't translate to others very well.

"But at present I seem incapable of religious experience..."

2011-07-15T01:16:00.003-05:00

"Another problem: "Yes, at one time I was capable of religious experience, I grew up in normal circumstances. But at present I seem incapable of religious experience."

You are mistaken... I will give you two answers. Let's assume your feelings have gone numb and grown cold, so you are no longer as receptive for religious things as you once were. Everything inside you is dry, dry, dry. In that case I can tell you : Wait a little while! What you once experience (I am speaking as psychologist) will come to life again later. I have already drawn your attention to the fact: There are impressions that sink into the subconscious but later come back to life (I am speaking as psychologist). For example, if as children we had good mothers, how much longing arises once we grow old! The original experience comes to life again. It is the same in this case [of numb, cold feelings]. That is the first answer: Even if [numbness and coldness is the case at present], later the experiences will again come back to life.

It is one thing to renounce such feelings when God takes us in hand in our mature years, it is quite another to grow up emotionless in the course of a normal education.

The second answer: Do you believe that, if we are seriously striving, God is constantly going to shower us with blissful feelings? If we want to belong totally to God, if he wants to have us completely, the time will come when our good God will lay us on the operating table and take our feelings from us: the feeling of being good, of being upright, of being religious. Ordinarily, he does this once when we have given ourselves totally to him. Yes the time comes when our good God makes sure that the others rob us of our reputation, that our drives are roused to their very roots, that all the dirty waters burst forth. Why all this? We are to learn to let him detach us from ourselves."

- Father Joseph Kentenich, Daß neue Menschen werden

I have been reading "Forming the New Person" for a while now. Many times in the past semester, I picked it up and read the first chapter, but put it down and forgot about it for a while. Thus many re-readings of the first chapter. However this summer has really allowed me to read more. For the whole first month of summer, I have not had many activities or things I must do. Even through my lackadaisical time at home, I was still able to read a good amount of this book.

As I read more, it rings true with my life and with the lives of others that I see. The book is a transcript of a conference he gave to a group expecting to hear things about Mary. It was also supposed to be followed up with two other conferences "to work out a complete system of Marian pedagogy set in the pedagogical situation of our time." However he was unable to complete the other two conferences.

Within this conference, composed of 16 talks that are interdependent and compounded, Fr. Kentenich talks about the Family, Home experience, Father and Mother, condemns mechanistic thinking, Spiritual Atmosphere, Religious Education, Marian Education and more.

It is a book that I highly recommend and perhaps will discuss more.

Blessed Pentecost

2011-06-12T09:00:00.005-05:00

Mary,
In the midst of the apostles
You powerfully interceded
The coming of the promised Spirit,
Who transformed weak men
And guides the Church on the road to victory.
Open our hearts for the Spirit of God
That he may change the course of the world.

Holy Spirit,
You are the soul of my soul.
I humbly adore you.
Enlighten me, strengthen me,
Guide me, comfort me.
Reveal you wishes to me
As far as this is in accordance
With the will of the Eternal Father.
Show me what Eternal Love wants of me.
Show me what I should do.
Show me what I should suffer.
Show me what I should humbly and
Thoughtfully accept, bear, and endure.
Holy Spirit, show me your will
And the will of the Father,
For I want my whole life to be nothing else
Than a continuous, and everlasting yes
To the wishes, to the will of God,
The Eternal Father.

Amen.

And as Mark Hart suggests, look over Genesis 11 and Acts 2 when you get the chance.

Blessed Pentecost!

Thirty Week Challenge

2011-06-08T08:00:00.003-05:00

So I haven't exactly come up with a purpose for this blog like I thought I would. As I think about it, I'm not particularly good at anything and I haven't mastered anything either. I don't have too much insight to offer or say.

I guess the only thing I can say I know about is my own life, my own experience (one would hope). So for now we'll leave the purpose to that : my experiences and thoughts about them.

In the mean time since I haven't been regularly posting or thinking much on the different post topics I do have, I'll go ahead and follow suit with Emily and start this thirty week (day) question challenge to get something more regular going. I don't find some of the questions very interesting though so I'm open to suggestions!

For week one: A guilty pleasure
I'll go with one that is a bit more obvious: blogs and blogging!

A bit of what my old blog looked like. Very "shonen" haha

I really like reading about people's lives and what people have to say. I think I've been "blogging" since about middle school (though Xanga posts about my days aren't much of a blog). When I started, I didn't have much to say (and still don't), but I always enjoyed the design. With Xanga, I could use html and make the blog look and feel like whatever I wanted. I could put music on there if I wanted and move things around.

Now with blogger starting back in my senior year of high school (wow it's been three years!), I can do similar things though not through my own coding. I have to say that Blogger has done a good job of making it easier for me to move things around, though there isn't as much freedom to it as writing your own code (at least it's a lot less tedious!).

I almost moved to Wordpress a few months ago, but it really limited me and what I could do to make it look like I wanted it to. I started messing around with the CSS features, but then I realized you actually have to pay to make use of them, so I just abandoned it.

At the heart of it all, it was my way (not very unique for a middle-schooler) of getting my thoughts out, almost like a journal. But I also blogged about things that interested me and things that I knew something about, though not often probably. I also really liked the interaction of it all: being able to see what other people are writing about and comment on them, seeing their responses to what I have written, etc. I guess it was like the facebook before facebook was allowed for anyone (above "13").

You know it gets really bad when you're following lots of people and have over 500 unread posts on your google reader dashboard dealio. Or when you open so many windows of certain posts that you start saving them with dates in your bookmarks.

I guess that's what makes this guilty. Great for when you don't have anything to do. Not advised for students.

Memorial Day

2011-05-30T22:24:00.000-05:00

President Reagan is right. They did give their lives for us. And they are great for their sacrifice. They should be our example and a motivation for us.

And even though Joseph Engling wasn't an American, I would still like to remember him and his saintly example.

"All things to all men, and Mary's very own"

L'Angélus

2011-05-28T01:15:00.002-05:00

I'm quickly falling in love this family band! I first discovered them about a year ago. Not sure how, but I found their website where you can signup for their news letter and receive a free download of a song from their Christmas album("O Night Divine"). From then on, I knew about them, but didn't look too much further into them.

Then this past semester, a friend invited me to a concert type deal they were having. He heard about it from one of his friends who's a big fan. So I decided I would go with him. Before actually going, I looked up a bit of what this was exactly and found out that it was a family dance type deal at St. Williams in Round Rock. Heard that St. Williams was a nice church from some other friends who got to go to an Adore event there during lent, but otherwise didn't know too much about the whole thing. And family dance? I mean yeah we're all Catholic and family oriented and all, but this too me was a totally new concept. Actually it sounds kinda like the dancing one might find at a quincinera or wedding, or even a bat/bar mitzva if you find the right people.
Going to the event, it truly was more of a dance than a concert, and the type I might enjoy more than club dancing. And actually it was a bit awkward for me at first, being in a room of predominantly white and unfamiliar people with three other Asian guys who don't really know how to dance or know anyone to dance with.
Of course Angélus opened with one of their biggest songs, Ça C'est Bon (and quite a good one). Besides songs they wrote themselves, they also played a few more well known songs like Brown Eyed Girl and some others (I didn't know that Be Thou My Vision could be such a good song to slow dance to!).

As the night went on, they explained a little more about why they were at St. Williams. The organizer of the whole thing (who I assume to be a parishoner of St. Williams and the organizer for a youth group as well, fische) gave a quick history of how the whole thing came together in a week or two and almost fell through because there was no place to host Angélus. But it all worked out because of Divine Providence (of course).
The four (out of eight children) who came out explained that they came to raise money for their whole family to go to Madrid this summer! They were invited to play for the english speaking community at World Youth Day 2011. Oh hey, I'll be there too! haha

When I went to the counter in the back to see if I could by one of their CD's, I didn't have enough, but I decided to donate the money I did have to them. And the organizer out did my generosity and said he would pay the difference. And so now I can listen to them all the time! S'awesome!

(On a side note to the whole concert/dance, one of the guys I went with isn't Catholic. He drove us all and when we got there, I found a rosary out side of his car with just about no one else around or near the parking lot, so I left the rosary on his hood. When we were leaving he thought of it as a gift and hung it on his rear view window. It's not the same as praying with it, but it's still a step in the right direction. Praying that many graces flow to him through it. And he even liked the concert/dance for the family environment!)

Having taken 6 years of french (though I'm still horrible at it) and played 7 years of violin (again though I'm still horrible at it), how could I not like their style of music? It's a very clean sound that isn't muddle with sfx or any of that kind of thing. And their joie de vivre! (So lively that I can't listen to them before I go to sleep.. or else I won't sleep.) And best of their lyrics! They actually have meaning! They tell a story(I especially like the first half of their Ça C'est Bon CD). Did I mention they're a Catholic family? You should check them out!

What's the Point: Video Games

2011-05-23T02:10:00.001-05:00

Maybe this will become a sort of series: "What's the point".

At any rate let us begin. Jeux vidéo, something most everyone of our generation and times has played, experienced, or at the very least heard of. But what does it matter? Yes games can bring many together through it's adventure and story, yes they can be a chance for someone to relieve stress, and yes video games may have some bit of teaching elements in them (albeit only because of the story and for the mass games, generally not for their educational value).

Again I will agree that it can be used as a medium of relation with others.

But I agree more with this article:

I've heard other people refer to their video game habits as a "harmless addiction." Is there really any such thing? My own experience is that while I'm playing my game, I am thoroughly caught up in it. But afterward, I always wish I hadn't wasted my time. Recreation should leave us more connected to others, or more in touch with ourselves, or more informed, or more fit, or more profound, or more well-rounded, or closer to God. Leisure time is the basis of culture. It is the time for creativity, in which we can break out of the rote of the workaday world, and explore the vast possibilities of our own being.

In my own experience, after playing games, especially after a long time but even after short periods, I've come to regret it. This may be due to the fact that I'll tend to play when I have other things to worry about (but then again, when don't we have other things to worry about?), but when I do have some time, the summer for instance, I still find it a waste of time.

And I'm sure as the second article pointed out, there are other effects of playing video games which I'm totally leaving out as I cannot asses them, but just on the surface level, I cannot agree that playing WoW or SC2 for hours on end can be much good for you, even just to hang out with friends, there are better things to spend your time together with.

As always, I await your thoughts on the topic.

Hasta Que el Mundo Arda por Él

2011-05-03T15:09:00.000-05:00

Until the World is Burning for You

Slowly I've been liking this song more and more. My first encounter with it was Joaquin giving me a short lesson of the intro, though I had no idea what the song actually was.

By some circumstances, I ended up playing guitar for a boys youth retreat and was given a song book and later when I had the time I found out what song it was that I learned from Joaquin. Then I learned a bit more, but it had some strange chords.

Then last night, I actually translated the lyrics:

Mary, I give all that I have and am. I offer you my heart today as a child who comes to you and speaks their song. Drop by drop, I give my blood; day by day living your mission.

Make me a torch that burns for Christ. Ignite my heart to be a home, like the sun that spreads your light, until the world is burning for Him, until the world is burning for Him.

Mary, I want to start sounding new ways to be holy and if I die, my life I want to deliver.

Of course my Spanish isn't the best, but that's something to work on.

Summer Approaches

2011-05-01T04:30:00.004-05:00

As I read more and more of Joseph Engling's biography, I see parallels between our lives. As he did, I wish to draw closer to our Blessed Mother, especially in this month of hers.

This is a quote from his journal about one of his vacations at home:
"The last days were days of hard work. But all of it was done out of love for my parents. Mother, I give you everything, my whole vacation. In this vacation I really experienced what love can do. How beautiful life is when it is filled with mutual love, when children try to please their parents, when parents experience joy in their children, when one hand helps the other and works to make the other's live bearable. Then there is true joy in the home. How good it feels to have such parents, such brothers and sister! Such love must also prevail in Schoenstatt. To bring this about will be my aim as a member of the Courtesy Group. Volo omnibus omnia fieri, tibi, Maria specialiter mancipatus. Mother bless me."

I thought I had so many things to write, but really I have little to say about each them. I especially see this since for some short writings on ethics questions for my communications class I get feedback saying something similar to "you have no basis for what you say." All these thoughts, yet I cannot explain it to them in laymens' terms.

I'm realizing more and more that I'm not very good at talking, especially small talk and chit chatting. But from Engling's biography, I'm seeing what people talk about. Each person converses based on their human experiences. Now I just need to start recalling my own and not discarding them as worthless. My human experiences are the basis of my life.

Hope all of you well in your life journeys this May. May Mary bless us.

Coming to Our Senses

2011-04-10T13:41:00.003-05:00

Excerpt from “Death on a Friday Afternoon” by Fr. Richard John Neuhaus

The First Word from the Cross:
“Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.”

Perhaps you are reading this in the summertime, or in autumn, or in the dead of winter. It makes no difference. I do not ask you to forget the present and imagine that it is Holy Week. Rather, I invite you to be open to the thought that this time that you are now calling the present is Holy Week, for all time was there, is there, at the cross.

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Christians call them the Triduum Sacrum, the three most sacred days of the year, the three most sacred days of all time when time is truly told. Maundy Thursday, so called because that night before he was betrayed he gave the command, the mandatum, that we should love one another. Not necessarily with the love of our desire but with a demanding love, even a demeaning love—as in washing the feet of faithless friends who will run away and leave you naked to your enemies.

Then the second day, the Friday we so oddly call good. And the third day, the Great Vigil of Resurrection conquest. Do not rush to the conquest. Stay a while with this day. Let your heart be broken by the unspeakably bad of this Friday we call good. Some scholars speculate that “Good Friday” comes from “God's Friday,” as “goodbye” was originally “God be by you.” But it is just as odd that it should be called God's Friday, when it is the day that we say goodbye to the glory of God. Wherever its name comes from, let your present moment stay with this day; stay a while in the eclipse of the light, stay a while with the conquered One. There is time enough for Easter.

By these three days all the world is called to attention. Everything that is and ever was and ever will be, the macro and the micro, the galaxies beyond number and the microbes beyond notice—everything is mysteriously entangled with what happened, with what happens, in these days. This is the axis mundi, the center upon which the cosmos turns. In the derelict who cries from the cross is, or so Christians say, the Alpha and Omega, the beginning and the end. The life of all on this day died. Stay a while with that dying.

Every human life, conceived from eternity and destined to eternity, here finds its story truly told. In this killing that some call senseless we are brought to our senses. Here we find out who we most truly are because here is the One who is what we are called to be. The derelict cries, “Come, follow me.” Follow him there? We recoil. We close our ears. We hurry on to Easter. But we will not know what to do with Easter's light if we shun the friendship of the darkness that is wisdom's way to light.

In Good Friday's service of the seven words, alongside this first word from the cross, we read the parable of the prodigal son, the wayward son, the wastrel son. It is all there in the fifteenth chapter of Luke's Gospel. Determined to reach for the stars, to seize the light, to shatter the restraints of life, he went to his father and asked for all he could get. The father, with deep foreboding and breaking heart, gave him what he asked for. So lightly, so eagerly, did impetuous youth leave the love that gave him life. He rushed to the light.

And so the prodigal son went off to what we are told was a distant country. There he wasted his money, he wasted his energies, he wasted his youth. With what he had and with what he was he bought friends and pleasure, until he had no more and was no more what he had been. Destitute, he was reduced to feeding the pigs, and envying the pigs for the slop they ate. And then, in the eclipse of the light, we encounter those abruptly wondrous words in the Gospel account: “He came to his senses.” Other translations say that “he came to himself.” I will return to that later—how we come to know our true selves when we are encountered by an “other” who defines who we are. But, for the moment, we stay with the simple telling of the tale.

He came to his senses. “What am I doing, what have I done, with my life?” From this madness, from the darkness of delusion, we are told that he turned his face homeward, homeward to the waiting father. The father saw him coming from afar. He was way off down the road, not even near the house yet. I suspect the father had been going out every day, month after month, maybe year after year. Waiting for his son—this son so filled with promise, this son so filled with light—to return to the love that gave him life. Day after day, the father had slowly turned back to the house disappointed. This day he had gone out once again, hoping against hope, expecting against expectation, and this day, there in the distance, there just over the horizon, his son.

He saw him from afar off, coming home, coming home to the waiting father. Quickly: the fatted calf, the robe of many colors, the ring of fidelity restored. And the father forgave him everything, even the calculated confession by which he would win his father's favor. Of the son it is said, “He came to his senses,” and coming to his senses he came to his father.

Good Friday brings us to our senses. Our senses come to us as we sense that in this life and in this death is our life and our death. The truth about the crucified Lord is the truth about ourselves. “Know yourself,” the ancient philosophers admonish us, for in knowing yourself is the beginning of wisdom. To which the Psalmist responds, “The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom.” The beginning of wisdom is to come to our senses and know the fearful truth about ourselves, that we have wandered and wasted our days in a distant country far from home. We know ourselves most truly in knowing Christ, for in him is our true self. His cross is the way home to the waiting father. “If you would come to your senses,” he says, “come, follow me.”

The ancient Christian fathers spoke of the Christ event as the “recapitulation” of the entire human drama. In this one life, all lives are summed up; in the eternal present of this one life, the past is encompassed and the future is anticipated, and the life of Everyman and Everywoman is most truly lived. “I am the way, the truth, and the life,” he said. Not a way among other ways, not a truth among other truths, not a life among other lives, but the way of all ways, the truth of all truths, and the life of all lives. Recapitulation. It means, quite simply and solemnly, that this is your life, this is my life, and we have not come to our senses until we sense ourselves in the life, and death, of Christ.

“When I came to you, brethren,” writes St. Paul to the Corinthians, “I did not come proclaiming to you the testimony of God in lofty words or wisdom. For I decided to know nothing among you except Jesus Christ and him crucified.” Stay a while. Do not hurry by the cross on your way to Easter joy, for we know the risen Lord only through Christ and him crucified. The philosopher Alfred North Whitehead said that the only simplicity to be trusted is the simplicity to be found on the far side of complexity. The only joy to be trusted is the joy on the far side of a broken heart; the only life to be trusted is the life on the far side of death.

We contemplate for a time the meaning of Good Friday, and then return to what is called the real world of work and shopping and commuter trains and homes. As we come out of a movie theater and shake our heads to clear our minds of another world where we lived for a time in suspended disbelief, as we reorient ourselves to reality, so we leave our contemplation—we leave the church building, we close the book—where for a time another reality seemed possible, believable, even real. But, we tell ourselves, the real world is a world elsewhere. It is the world of deadlines to be met, of appointments to be kept, of taxes to be paid, of children to be educated. From here, from this moment at the cross, it is a distant country. “Father, forgive them, for they have forgotten the way home. They have misplaced the real world.”

Not long ago I was invited to lecture to a large group of clergy in the Midwest. They had for two days been studying sacramental and liturgical theology, and it came time for the bishop to introduce me. “It has been a rewarding two days,” he said, “as we have been thinking about worship and the sacramental life, but now we have Father Neuhaus to return us to the real world as he addresses the subject of the Church and social responsibility.”

Really? The real world? What then is that other world of worship, prayer, and contemplative exploration into the mystery of Christ's presence, a presence ever elusive and disturbingly near? On the part of the bishop it was perhaps a slip of the tongue, but behind slips of the tongue are slips of the mind and sometimes slips of the soul. It happens among all Christians today, of whatever denomination or persuasion, that there is a great slippage of the soul. It is by this world, this world at the cross, that reality is measured and judged. That other world, the world we call real, is a distant country until we with Christ bring it home to the waiting father.

We are bringing it home, dragging it all behind us: the deadlines and the duties, the fears of failure and hopes for advancement, the loves unreturned, the plans disappointed, the children we lose, the marriage we cannot mend. And so we come loping along with reality's baggage, returning to the real—the real that we left behind when we left for what we mistook as the real world. “I will arise and go to my father, and I will say to him, ‘Father, I have sinned against heaven and before you; I am no longer worthy to be called your son.'“ I am no longer worthy to be called your son. I am no longer worthy to be called your daughter. And Christ our elder brother takes the baggage and hoists it upon his shoulders, adding this to all that on the cross he is bearing and bringing home. “Father, forgive them, for they knew not what they were doing.”

“Come to me,” he had earlier said, “all you who are weary and heavy burdened, and I will give you rest.” Bring me your baggage.

“Father, forgive them.” For whom does he pray forgiveness? For the leaders of his own people, a fragile, frightened establishment that could not abide the threat of the presence of a love so long delayed. For pitiable Pilate, forever wringing his hands forever soiled. For the soldiers who did the deed, who wielded the whip, who drove the nails, who thrust the spear, it all being but a day's work on foreign assignment, far from home. And for us he asks forgiveness, for we were there.

On the Sunday that begins Holy Week we read the passion story and come to the part where the crowd shouts, “Crucify him! Crucify him!” That part is read by the entire congregation, for we were there. The old spiritual asks, “Were you there when they crucified my Lord?” Yes, we answer. Yes, we were there when we crucified our Lord.

Over the centuries theologians have contrived wondrously refined theories of the atonement; why it is that this One had to die, why it is that his dying is for us death's death, why it is that his open tomb opens for every last child of earth the door to tomorrows without end. And all the theories of atonement are but probings into mystery, the mystery of a love that did not have to be but was, and is. All the theories are intellectual variations, imaginative riffs, on the assertion of St. Paul that “God was in Christ reconciling the world to Himself, not counting their trespasses against them, and entrusting to us the message of reconciliation.” As the prodigal son was reconciled to his father, but infinitely more so.

“Not counting their trespasses.” Accountants reconcile the books, and there is no doubt that the disordered books of our lives need reconciling. But the books are disordered by our disordered lives, and our lostness cannot be remedied by the accountant's craft. Someone must go to the distant country where we have strayed, as a good shepherd seeks a sheep that is lost. Someone must go, but not just anyone. If we are to be brought home, it has to be one who is, in the words of the Nicene Creed, “God from God, Light from Light, true God from true God.”

Only he can bring us home who comes from home, who comes from God. Coming from the very heart of God, he is God. And so we say that God became man. It is the longest journey, long beyond our ability to imagine. God became man. We say it trembling, we say it puzzling, but more often we say it rotely, counting on routine to buffer what we cannot bear. What can we do with the burden of such a truth? This is the awful truth: that we made necessary the baby crying in the cradle become the derelict crying from the cross. The awful truth—as in awe-filled, filled with awe.

Atonement. It is a fine, solid, twelfth—century Middle English word, the kind of word one is inclined to trust. Think of at-one-ment: what was separated is now at one. But after such a separation there can be no easy reunion. Reconciliation must do justice to what went wrong. It will not do to merely overlook the wrong. We could not bear to live in a world where wrong is taken lightly, where right and wrong finally make no difference. In such a world, we—what we do and what we are—would make no difference. Spare me a gospel of easy love that makes of my life a thing without consequence.

St. Paul again: God was in Christ “not counting their trespasses against them.” Atonement is not an accountant's trick, it is not a kindly overlooking, it is not a not counting of what must count if anything in heaven or on earth is to matter. God could not simply decide not to count without declaring that we do not count.

But someone might say that, if God is God, He could do anything. Very well, then, God would not decide not to count because He would not declare that we do not count. And yet God's “would” implicates and limits His “could.” The God of whom we speak is not, in the words of Pascal, the God of the philosophers but the God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. He is the God of unbounded freedom who willed to be bound by love. God is what He wills to be and wills to be what He is. St. John tells us, “God is love,” and love always binds. In the seminars of philosophical speculation, many gods are possible. In the arena of salvation's story, God is the God who is bound to love.

He does not count our trespasses against us because something has been done about them. He reckons us sinners to be righteous because sins have been set to right. Dorothy Day, founder of the Catholic Worker movement among the poor, spoke of a “harsh and dreadful love.” It is the love of Christ's cross borne for us, and of the cross he calls us to bear. Dietrich Bonhoeffer, Lutheran pastor and martyr under the tyranny of the Third Reich, wrote against and lived against the “cheap grace” that cheapens sin and forgiveness alike. Cheap grace is easy grace. Cheap grace does not reckon what went wrong; it requires no costly love.

We confess to hurting someone we love and she says, “Forget it. It's nothing. It doesn't matter.” But she knows and we know that it is not nothing and it does matter and we will not forget it. Forgive and forget, they say, but that is surely wrong. What is forgotten need not, indeed cannot, be forgiven. Love does not say to the beloved that it does not matter, for the beloved matters. Spare me the sentimental love that tells me what I do and what I am does not matter.

Forgiveness costs. Forgiveness costs dearly. There are theories of atonement saying that Christ paid the price. His death appeased God's wrath and satisfied God's justice. That way of putting it appeals to biblical witness and venerable tradition, and no doubt contains great truth. Yet for many in the past and at present that way of speaking poses great problems. The subtlety of the theory is overwhelmed by the cartoon picture of an angry Father who demands the death of His Son, maybe even kills His Son, in order to appease His own wrath. In its vulgar form—which means the form most common—it is a matter of settling scores, a drama vengeful and vindictive, more worthy of The Godfather than of the Father of whom it is said, “God is love.”

And yet forgiveness costs. Forgiveness is not forgetfulness; not counting their trespasses is not a kindly accountant winking at what is wrong; it is not a benign cooking of the books. In the world, in our own lives, something has gone dreadfully wrong, and it must be set right. Recall when you were a little child and somebody—maybe you—did something very bad. Maybe a lie was told, or some money was stolen, or the cookie jar lies shattered on the kitchen floor. The bad thing has been found out, and now something must happen, something must be done about it. The fear of punishment is terrible, but not as terrible as the thought that nothing will happen, that bad things don't matter. If bad things don't matter, then good things don't matter, and then nothing matters, and the meaning of everything lies shattered like the cookie jar on the kitchen floor.

Trust that child's intuition. “Unless you become as little children,” Jesus said, “you cannot enter the kingdom of God.” Unless we are stripped of our habits of forgetting, of our skillful making of excuses, of our jaded acceptance of a world in which bad things happen and it doesn't matter.

This, then, is our circumstance. Something has gone dreadfully wrong with the world, and with us in the world. Things are out of whack. It is not all our fault, but it is our fault too. We cannot blame our distant parents for that fateful afternoon in the garden, for we were there. We, too, reached for the forbidden fruit—the forbidden fruit by which we know good and evil but, much more fatefully, by which we presume to name good and evil. For most of us, our rebellion did not have about it the gargantuan defiance depicted in Milton's Paradise Lost. Most of us did not, as some do, stand on a mountain peak and shake a clenched fist against the storming skies, cursing God.

But then, neither were Adam or Eve so melodramatic. On a perfectly pleasant afternoon in paradise, they did no more than listen to an ever so reasonable voice. “Did God really mean that? Surely He wants you to be yourself, to decide for yourself. Would He have made something so very attractive only to forbid it? The truth is He wants you to be like Him, to be like gods.” The fatal step was not in knowing the difference between good and evil. Before what we call “the fall” they knew the good in the fullest way of knowing, which is to say that they did the good, they lived the good. They knew the good honestly, straightforwardly, simply, uncomplicatedly, without shame.

Some thinkers have argued that “the fall” was really a fall up rather than a fall down. By the fall our first parents were raised, it is said, to a higher level of consciousness in the knowing of good and evil. Now they know no longer simply and directly but reflexively; now they know in the consciousness of knowing. This, however, is but another conceit of our fallen nature. It is as though a paraplegic, marvelously skilled in the complex maneuvering of his wheelchair, were to despise the healthy as belonging to a lower order because they walk simply, in blithe ignorance of the complexity of movement that the paraplegic knows so well. The conceit is that our complicated way of knowing is superior because it is ours.

What we call our higher level of consciousness is but an instance of our calling evil good, of our priding ourselves on the consequence of the catastrophe that is our fall from the knowledge of the good. True knowledge of the good is a way of knowing that is, in the words of Jesus, loving the Lord our God with all our heart and all our soul and all our mind. The reflexive mind, the divided soul, the conflicted heart—these many take to be the marks of maturity and growth. To know the good simply, to love the good and do the good because it is self—evidently to be loved and to be done, that is taken to be the mark of those whom we condescendingly call simple. So it is that sin's injury is declared a benefit, our weakness a strength, and the fall of that dread afternoon a fall up rather than down. Of those who thus confound good and evil, St. Paul says “they glory in their shame.”

If good would come from eating of the Tree of Knowledge, God would not have forbidden it. Nor, contrary to popular myth, is the fatal knowledge the knowledge of sexuality, although God knows how large is the part of sexuality in our glorying in our shame. Yet the fall was not a fall into sexuality. Adam and Eve were created as sexual beings, and the Genesis account leaves no doubt that from the beginning they knew what this meant. “Therefore a man leaves his father and his mother and cleaves to his wife, and they become one flesh. And the man and his wife were both naked, and were not ashamed.”

The shame came later, when they reached, when they overreached, for a different kind of knowledge. The Hebrew verb “to know,” yada, is rich in meanings. In connection with what we call the fall, to know good and evil is to reach for a universal knowledge, to be unbounded by truth as it is presented to us, to aspire to create our own truth. I say we were there in the garden when humanity aspired to “be like gods” by knowing good and evil, by reaching to know the power to define what is good and what is evil.

This page of Genesis is rewritten every day in the living out of the human story. Each of us has been there when we, god-like, decided that we would decide what is good and what is evil. At least for our own lives. Perhaps we shied away from the god-like pretension of making a universal rule that applies to all. Modestly—or so we said—we limited ourselves to deciding “what is good for me” and “what is wrong for me.” “I can speak only for myself,” we say. We would not think of “imposing” our judgment upon others. Under the cover of modesty, we deny the truth about the good and the evil that does not require our permission to be true. Thus we would evade the truth of good and evil that brings us to judgment. The truth is that we do not judge the truth; the truth judges us.

“And they heard the sound of the Lord God walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and the man and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the Lord God among the trees of the garden.” It was the cool of the day, toward evening, when the light was going out. “Where are you, Adam?” And Adam said, “I heard the sound of Thee in the garden, and I was afraid, because I was naked; and I hid myself.” And the Lord God said, “Who told you that you were naked? Have you eaten of the tree of which I commanded you not to eat?”

And so the questions come at us. Who told us that we are naked? Who so complexified our existence? From where did we get this reflexive knowledge so that we no longer simply know but know only our act of knowing? How did it happen that the simplicity of loving is now displaced by unending complexity over the meanings of love? And why are we ashamed of our nakedness, a nakedness that was once the sign of immediacy to the beloved but is now a sign of innocence lost, of ludicrous vulnerability in the face of our pretension to be our own god, a sign of our sad ending up as our own best beloved? Where are you, my prodigal son Adam? Into what distant country have you gone?

The questions come at each of us. Were you there when they reached for an alien knowledge, turned away from the light, and hid themselves in shame? Of course we were there. Not once but many times we have been there, hiding from the voice of the waiting father who calls in the night, “Where are you?”
The first Word from the cross: “Father, forgive them.”
Forgiveness costs. Whatever the theory of atonement, this is at the heart of it, that forgiveness costs. Any understanding of what makes at-one-ment possible includes a few simple truths. First, like the child, we know that something very bad has happened. Something has gone very wrong with us and with the world of which we are part. The world is not and we are not what we know was meant to be. That is the most indubitable of truths; it is beyond dispute, it weighs with self-evident force upon every mind and heart that has not lost the sensibility that makes us human.

The something very bad that has happened takes the form of the long, dreary list of history's horribles, from concentration camps to the tortured death of innocent children. And it takes the everyday forms of the habits of compromise, of loves betrayed, of lies excused, of dreams deferred until they die. The indubitable truth is illustrated in ways beyond numbering, from Auschwitz to the shattered cookie jar on the kitchen floor. Something very bad has happened.

Second—and here I simplify outrageously, but our purpose is to cut through to the heart of the matter—we are complicit in what has gone so terribly wrong. We have problems with that. World-class criminals, and murderers, and drug traffickers, if they know what they have done, may have no trouble with that, but for many of us it may be a bit hard to swallow. I mean, we haven't done anything that bad, have we? Surely nothing so bad as to make us responsible for the death of God on the cross. True, the writer of 1 Timothy called himself “the chief of sinners,” and a person such as St. Paul did do some nasty things to the Christians in his earlier life as Saul of Tarsus. But then it would seem that he made up for it with an exemplary, indeed saintly, life. Chief of sinners? There would seem to be an element of pious hyperbole there, perhaps even an unseemly boastfulness, a reverse pride, so to speak.

It is difficult to face up to our complicity because the confession of sins does not come easy. It is also difficult because we do not want to compound our complicity by claiming sins that are not ours. We rightly recoil from those who seem to wallow in guilt. The story is told of the rabbi and cantor on Yom Kippur, the Day of Atonement. One after the other, they lament their sins at great length, each concluding that he is a nobody. Then the sexton, inspired by their example, laments his sins and declares that he, too, is a nobody. “Nuh,” says the rabbi to the cantor, “Who is he to be a nobody?”

Contemporary sensibilities are offended by what is dismissively termed “guilt tripping.” Some while ago I was on the same lecture platform with a famous television evangelist from California who is noted for accenting the positive and upbeat in the Christian message. According to this evangelist, it is as with Coca-Cola: Everything goes better with Jesus. He had built a huge new church which he called, let us say, New Life Cathedral, and he explained that during the course of the building there was a debate about whether the cathedral should feature a cross. It might prompt negative thoughts, maybe even thoughts about suffering and death. “Finally, I said that of course there will be a cross,” the famous evangelist said. “After all, the cross is the symbol of Christianity and we are a Christian church. But I can guarantee you,” he declared with a triumphant smile, “there is nothing downbeat about the cross at New Life Cathedral!”

St. Paul said the cross is “foolishness to the Greeks and a stumbling block to the Jews,” and he seemed to think it would always be that way. Little did he know what gospel salesmanship would one day achieve. In the eighteenth century, Isaac Watts wrote the hymn: “Alas! and did my Savior bleed, / And did my Sovereign die? / Would he devote that sacred head / For such a worm as I?” A worm? Really now. A contemporary hymnal puts it this way: “Would he devote that sacred head / For sinners such as I?” Surely, “sinners” is bad enough. Similarly with the much beloved “Amazing Grace.” “Amazing grace, how sweet the sound / That saved a wretch like me.” “Wretch” will never do. That is cleaned up in a contemporary version: “That loved a soul like me.”

Examples can be multiplied many times over. Groveling is out, self-esteem is in. And if self-esteem seems not quite the right note for Good Friday, at least our complicity can be understood as limited liability. Very limited. Perhaps the changes in Christian thought are not all bad. There have been in Christian devotion excesses of self-accusation, of “scrupulosity,” as it used to be called. Wallowing in guilt and penitential grandstanding are justly criticized. And yet . . . We cannot just take the scissors to all those Bible passages that say he died for us and because of us, that they were our sins that he bore upon the cross. Yes, Christianity is about resurrection joy. But do not rush to Easter. Good Friday makes inescapable the question of complicity.

I may think it modesty when I draw back from declaring myself chief of sinners, but it is more likely a failure of imagination. For what sinner should I speak if not for myself? Of all the billions of people who have lived and of all the thousands whom I have known, whom should I say is the chief of sinners? Surely I am authorized, surely I am competent, to speak only for myself? When in the presence of God the subject of sin is raised, how can I help but say that chiefly it is I? Not to confess that I am chiefly the one is not to confess at all. It is the evasion of Adam who said, “It was the woman whom you gave me.” It is the evasion of Eve who said, “The serpent beguiled me.” It is not to confess at all, and by our making of excuses is our complicity compounded.

“Forgive them, for they know not what they do.” But now, like the prodigal son, we have come to our senses. Our lives are measured not by the lives of others, not by our own ideals, not by what we think might reasonably be expected of us, although by each of those measures we acknowledge failings enough. Our lives are measured by whom we are created and called to be, and the measuring is done by the One who creates and calls. Finally, the judgment that matters is not ours. The judgment that matters is the judgment of God who alone judges justly. In the cross we see the rendering of the verdict on the gravity of our sin.

We have come to our senses. None of our sins are small or of little account. To belittle our sins is to belittle ourselves, to belittle who it is that God creates and calls us to be. To belittle our sins is to belittle their forgiveness, to belittle the love of the father who welcomes us home.

From the same Latin root come “complicity” and “complexity.” Only the dulling of moral imagination prevents us from seeing how we are implicated in the complex web of human evil. The late Rabbi Abraham Joshua Heschel was fond of saying, “Some are guilty, all are responsible.” We rightly condemn the great moral monsters of history—the Hitlers and Stalins and Maos and lesser mass murderers. Justice requires the gradation of guilt. Distinctions are in order. In important ways, we are not like them and they are not like us. Yet complicity and complexity alert us to the ways in which their crimes find corrupting correlates in our own hearts. “He who looks at a woman to lust after her has already committed adultery with her in his heart.” Such words of Jesus encourage not scrupulosity but candor. Contemplating the unspeakable crimes of Stalin's gulag archipelago, Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn wrote, “The line between good and evil runs through every human heart.”

We would draw the line between ourselves and the really big-time sinners. For them the cross may be necessary. For us a forgiving wink from an understanding Deity will set things right. But the “big time” of sinning is in every human heart. We make small our selves when we make small our sins. Fearing the judgment of great evil, we shrink from the call to great good. Like Adam, we slink away to hide in a corner. Like the prodigal son, we hunker down behind the swine's trough of our shrunken lives. But then he came to his senses. He remembered who he was in his former life, in his real life. There is no way to that dignity restored except through the confession of that dignity betrayed.

Still we hold back from confession, holding on to the tattered remnants of our former dignity. The more Adam hides from his shame the more he proclaims his shame. What ludicrous figures we sinners cut. It is all so unnecessary; it only increases the complicity that we deny. We act as though there is not forgiveness enough. There is more than forgiveness enough.

Were you there when they crucified my Lord? Yes, we were there when we crucified our Lord. Recognizing the line that runs through every human heart, no longer do we try to draw the line between “them” and “us.” Who can look long and honestly at the victims and the perpetrators of history's horrors and say that this has nothing to do with me? To take the most obvious instance, where would we have taken our stand that Friday afternoon? With Mary and the Beloved Disciple or with the mocking crowds? Knowing myself and fearing God, knowing a thousand big and little things that I have done and failed to do, I cannot deny that I was there. In ways I do not fully understand, I know that I, too, did the deed, wielded the whip, drove the nails, thrust the spear.

About chief of sinners I don't know, but what I know about sinners I know chiefly about me. We did not mean to do the deed, of course. What we have done wrong—they seemed, or mostly seemed, small things at the time. The word of encouragement withheld, the touch of kindness not given, the visit not made, the trust betrayed, the cutting remark so clever and so cruel, the illicit sexual desire so generously entertained, the angry answer, the surge of resentment at being slighted, the time we thought a lie would do no harm. It is such a long and tedious list of little things. Surely not too much should be made of it, we thought to ourselves. But now it has come to this. It has come to the cross. All the trespasses of all the people of all time have gravitated here, to the killing grounds of Calvary.

Not only about our entanglement in the loss of each but also in the consequence of our deeds, John Donne was right: “No man is an island, entire of itself; every man is a piece of the continent, a part of the main.” It was not only for our sins, but surely for our sins, too. What a complex web of complicity is woven by our lives. Send not to know by whom the nails were driven; they were driven by you, by me.

Is there a perverse presumption in confessing that we did the deed? There could be, I suppose. But there is also prudence, and an irrepressible awareness of John Donne's truth about our entanglement with the whole. We pray with the Psalmist, “Who can discern his errors? Cleanse me from my secret faults.” Foolishly we hold back from the admission, separating ourselves from the full burden of the common deed. We do not know the measure of our trespass, whereas we know God's mercy is beyond measure. Be grateful that forgiveness is not limited to the sins that we know. “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.”

These, then, are two truths at the heart of atonement. First, that something has gone terribly wrong. We find ourselves in a distant country far from home. Second, whatever the measure of our guilt, we are responsible. Then third, that something must be done about it. Things must be set right. We cannot go on this way. False gospels of positive thinking or stoic exhortations to make the best of it are worse than useless. They are obscene. They are invitations to make our peace with a corruption at the core of everything. Better that Job and all the Jobs on the long mourning bench of history should curse God and die than that they should make their peace with the evil that they know. Such a peace is the peace of the dead, of those who are already spiritually and morally dead. The religious marketplace is crowded with the peddlers of peace of mind and peace of soul. But the narcotic of denial or pretense is too high a price to pay. Better to rage against the night.

Something must be done about what has gone wrong. Things must be set right. And this brings us to the fourth great truth of atonement: whatever it is that needs to be done, we cannot do it. Each of us individually, the entirety of the human race collectively—what can we do to make up for one innocent child tortured and killed? Never mind making up for Auschwitz, or the killing fields of Cambodia, or the coffin ships of traffickers in human slavery, or the slaughter beyond numbering of innocents in the womb. We chatter on about modernity and progress while King Herod reigns secure. “A voice was heard in Ramah, wailing and loud lamentation, Rachel weeping for her children; she refused to be comforted, for they were no more.”

Rightly does Rachel refuse to be comforted. Something must be done. It started long before Rachel and her children. From far back in the mists of our beginnings, the blood of Abel has been crying from the ground; and along the way we have allowed ourselves to be comforted by the counsel of Cain, advising us to get over it, to get on with our lives, for, after all, are we our brother's keeper? But we know we are. We don't know what to do about it, but we know that if we lose our hold on that impossible truth, we have lost everything. Something must be done. Justice must be done. Things must be set right.

But what can we do? We cannot even put our own lives in order, never mind setting right a radically disordered world. The Apostle Paul declares, “I can will what is right, but I cannot do it. For I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I do. . . . Wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death?” There is an answer to that question, but do not rush to the answer. Stay with the question for a time if you would understand why the derelict hangs there on the cross.

If things are to be set right, if justice is to be done, somebody else will have to do it. It cannot be done by just anybody, as though one more death could somehow “make up for” innocent deaths beyond numbering. That way lies the seeking out of scapegoats, the vain effort to heap our collective guilt on another, on the “other.” People have been doing that from the foundation of the world. History is filled with scapegoats sacrificed to appease outraged justice.

And the Lord commanded Moses that Aaron should bring the goat before the Lord, “and Aaron shall lay both his hands upon the head of the live goat, and confess over him all the iniquities of the people of Israel, and all their transgressions, and all their sins; and he shall put them upon the head of the goat, and send him away into the wilderness. The goat shall bear all their iniquities upon him to a solitary land.” The goat goes off to a distant country. God Himself trained ancient Israel in the ritual by which justice was satisfied, but only for a time. It is a training for what was to come, and for what was to surpass it.

Through the myths of millennia, blind and stumbling humanity acts upon the unquenchable intuition that something must be done. From Canaanite altars to Aztec temples, countless thousands have been offered in blood sacrifice. In the cruel twists of mythic imagination, the scapegoat is not expelled but destroyed. In our own enlightened century a nation sought to purify itself and the world by the extermination of the Jews. Even today we witness mobs outside prison walls cheering the execution taking place inside. It is a long, terrible history of bloodlust and vengeance, all in the name of justice, all driven by the insistence—the correct insistence—that something must be done.

As much as we are repulsed by it, that long, terrible history bears witness to an intuition that cannot be, and should not be, repressed. Something must be done. Otherwise, we live in a world without moral meaning. Otherwise, forgiveness is Bonhoeffer's “cheap grace” that trivializes evil and thereby also trivializes good. Otherwise, the elder brother, the one who resented his brother's welcome home, was right in protesting that the reconciliation with the father is cheap and easy and dishonest. Forgiveness costs, it must cost, or else the trespass does not matter. Is such an intuition primitive? Yes, primitive as in primordial, as in that which constitutes our moral being in the world.

If we cannot set things right, if we cannot even set ourselves, never mind the world, right—who, then, is to do it? It must be someone who is in no way responsible for what has gone wrong. It must be done by an act that is perfectly gratuitous, that is not driven by necessity, by an act that is perfectly free. The act must be by one who embodies everything, whose life is not one life among many but is life itself—a life that is our life and the life of all who have ever lived and ever will live. But where is such a one to be found?

The opening words of the Gospel of John: “In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. He was in the beginning with God; all things were made through him, and without him was not anything made that was made. In him was life, and the life was the light of men. The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it.” The one who is life itself does this because nobody else could do it. He who is light and life plunges headlong into darkness and death, and does so in perfect freedom. It is his mission, the reason he came into the world. “No one takes my life from me, but I lay it down of my own accord,” he said. “I have power to lay it down, and I have power to take it again; this charge I have received from my Father.”

The Father and the Son have colluded in a thing most astonishing, a thing on the far side of our ability to be astonished. Justice cries out to be satisfied; something must be done. From the blood of Abel, to the prison camps of Siberia, to the nine-year-old who this afternoon died of leukemia, justice cries out. These things must not be permitted to have the last word.

Who is at fault? Who is guilty? From the beginning of time, the wise and the good have wrestled with these questions. The wicked all have excuses. The guards at the death camps, the husband cheating on his wife, the executive padding his accounts, the physician giving a lethal dose of morphine in the nursing home—all have excuses. I was obeying superior orders; I have uncontrollable needs that must be satisfied; everybody does it; we must relieve the world of useless lives. Name the crime and it is fitted out with an excuse. My parents abused me; I was deprived; I was spoiled; my genes made me do it. And we are back to “Adam, where are you?” and his pathetic response, “The woman that you gave me . . .”

All the Adams and all the Eves join with the brightest and the best of philosophers to declare that this is just the way the world is. And who is responsible for that? And with that question was born what philosophers call the question of “theodicy”—how to justify to man the ways of God. And thus was God put on trial. If God is good and God is almighty, how did evil come about? If there is evil, how can an almighty God be good or a good God be almighty? In order to adjudicate these questions, we constituted ourselves the jury and the judge, and we put God in the dock. And soon enough we would constitute ourselves the executioner as well.

From every corner of the earth, from every scene of every crime, from North and South, from East and West, from the rich and from the poor, every mother's son and every father's daughter gathered. The jury deliberated, and the jury reached its verdict. The decision was unanimous. With one voice, poor deluded humanity pointed to the prisoner in the dock and declared, “God is guilty!”

The angels were stunned, the stars hid their light, the universe went silent at the audacity of it, the wrongness of it, the outrageousness of it. The Judge of the guilty is Himself judged guilty. Here now at last, in all the thick catalogue of human rebellion, is the lie so brazen as to surely bring down upon the heads of the insurrectionists a punishment swift and terrible. But no, the prisoner standing in the dock calmly responds, “For this was I born, and for this I have come into the world, to bear witness to the truth. Every one who is of the truth hears my voice.”

In perfect freedom, the Son become the goat become the Lamb of God is condemned by the lie in order to bear witness to the truth. The truth is that we are impotent to set things right. The truth is that the more we try to set things right, the more we compound our guilt. It is not enough that God take our part. God must take our place. All the blood of goats and lambs, all the innocent victims from the foundation of the world, all the acts of expiation and reparation, they only make things worse. They all strengthen the grip of the great lie that we can set things right. The grip of that lie is broken by the greatest of lies, “God is guilty!”

God must die. It is a lie so monstrous that to suggest it invites instant annihilation: except that God accepts the verdict. Those who know the awful truth hear His voice. And Jesus said, “Now is my soul troubled. And what shall I say? ‘Father, save me from this hour'? No, for this purpose I have come to this hour. Father, glorify Thy name.”

But how, we must ask, is God glorified by the humiliation and death of God? This great reversal of everything we think we know is too much to bear. Dark is light and light is dark, and right is wrong and wrong is right, and a lie is recruited to the service of the truth. The order of things is shattered. Precisely so, our disordered order is shattered so that things might be restored to order. And then Jesus said, “Now is the judgment of this world, now shall the ruler of this world be cast out; and I, when I am lifted up from the earth, will draw all men to myself.” The ruler of this world—the lord of disorder and of disordered humanity in his thrall—passes judgment on the Judge of all. The judgment is so monstrously false that only by submitting to it can its falseness be exposed. By Christ's submitting to the judgment of the world the world is judged.

Jesus might have been merely a moral teacher, pointing out the grotesque error of the judgment. Christianity would then have become a school of thought promoting his moral philosophy. Jesus came, however, to be the Lamb of God, living out and dying out this falsehood that would not die unless taken to its final conclusion. Only in this way would he be lifted up and draw all men to himself, not simply as our teacher but as our Savior and our Lord. Only by submitting to our folly could he save us from our folly. The drama had to be played out all the way. St. John writes of the night before he died. “Now before the feast of the Passover, when Jesus knew that the hour had come to depart out of this world to the Father, having loved his own who were in the world, he loved them to the end.”

He loved them to the end that they, too, might learn the way that is on the far side of outraged justice. That same night he told them, “This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you. Greater love has no man than this, that he lay down his life for his friends. You are my friends if you do what I command you.” And then he prayed for his friends, “Father, I desire that they also, whom Thou hast given me, may be with me where I am, to behold my glory which Thou hast given me in Thy love for me before the foundation of the world.”

From before the foundation of the world. In the beginning was the Word. Did God—Father, Son, and Holy Spirit—know from the beginning that it would turn out this way? From before the foundation of the world, from before the time when there was time, did God hear humanity's fatal verdict: “God is guilty! Crucify him! Crucify him!”? And did the Son say to the Father, from the beginning, that he would go in the power of the Spirit to submit himself to the sentence of death? St. Paul suggests as much: “But we impart a secret and hidden wisdom of God, which God decreed before the ages for our glorification. None of the rulers of this age understood this; for if they had, they would not have crucified the Lord of glory.”

Here we touch on mystery far beyond our ability to understand; we try to listen in on the conversation that is the very life of the Triune God, the life of God that is the power and love that enables all to be. Our desire to understand is as inescapable as our failure to understand. The more we search and the deeper we go, the more we cry out with Paul: “O the depth of the riches and wisdom and knowledge of God! How unsearchable are His judgments and how inscrutable His ways!” Yet surely the love with which Jesus loved the Father here on earth is one with the love of the Word that was in the beginning. The perfect self-surrender of the cross is, from eternity and to eternity, at the heart of what it means to say that God is love.

1 John puts it this way: “Beloved, let us love one another; for love is of God, and he who loves is born of God and knows God. He who does not love does not know God; for God is love.” Yes, from the foundation of the world God heard the rebel verdict, “God is guilty!” And from the beginning He knew what He would do about a humanity He created free to love Him, and therefore free to hate Him. God subjects Himself to the blasphemous lie that He is the guilty one. The rebellion did not take God by surprise. Redemption was not an improvisation, an emergency measure in response to an unexpected setback. From the beginning, “God was in Christ reconciling the world to Himself.” This is what it means to love; this is what it means to be love; this is what it means to say that God is love.

Yet it hardly seems possible that injustice could be set right by a still greater injustice, that wrong could be set right by a still greater wrong. That is what St. Paul appears to suggest, however, in the passage where he speaks of God in Christ reconciling the world to Himself. “For our sake he made him to be sin who knew no sin, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God.” The language is radical: not simply that he bore the consequences of sin but that he was made to be sin. The great reversal reverses all of our preconceptions. God must become what we are in order that we might become what God is. To effectively take our part, He must take our place.

The word “theodicy” means the judgment of God—not God judging us but our judging God. The philosophical problem of theodicy is that of trying to square God's ways with our sense of justice. This assumes that we know what justice is, but the entire story the Bible tells begins with the error of that presumption. It is the original error of our wanting to name good and evil. Right from the start Adam tried to put God in the dock, making God responsible for the fall because, after all, God gave him the woman who tempted him to sin. From the beginning we see the argument building up to humanity's cry, “God is guilty!”—building up to the derelict nailed to the cross.

In the long history of human philosophies, the name of the game has been theodicy. Trying to square the ways of God with our understanding of justice, some have concluded that He is not good, others that He is not almighty, and yet others that He is not at all. But the right question is not that of theodicy but of what we might call “homodicy”—the judgment of man. The crisis is not in justifying God's ways to us but in justifying our ways to God. “God was in Christ reconciling the world to Himself.” It is the world that needed to be reconciled to God's justice, not God to the world's justice. It does not say “God was in Christ reconciling Himself to the world.” After all, He is God and we are not; He is the Creator and we the creatures. It seems only right.

And yet. God reconciling the world to Himself is also God reconciling Himself to the world. In working out the plan of redemption, the Bible does not say that man became God but that God became man. Further, He reconciled Himself to the world by “not counting their trespasses against them.” He forgave us not by ignoring our trespasses but by assuming our trespasses. “For our sake He made him to be sin who knew no sin, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God.” God became what by right He was not so that we might become what by right we are not. This is what Christians through the ages have called “the happy exchange.” This exchange, this reversal, is at the very epicenter of the story of our redemption. In the Great Vigil of Easter we sing of the felix culpa—the happy fault: “O happy fault, O necessary sin of Adam that gained for us so great a Redeemer!”

In Matthew's Gospel this exchange is signaled at the very beginning of Jesus' ministry. John the Baptizer announces that Jesus is the one who “will baptize you with the Holy Spirit and with fire.” Jesus, he declares, has come to judge the world. Then we read: “Jesus came from Galilee to the Jordan to John to be baptized by him. John would have prevented him, saying, ‘I need to be baptized by you, and do you come to me?' But Jesus answered him, ‘Let it be so now; for thus it is fitting for us to fulfill all righteousness.' Then John consented.” God asks our consent when He takes our part by taking our place.

Later, on the night before he was betrayed, he poured water into a basin and began to wash the disciples' feet. He came to Peter and Peter said, “Lord, do you wash my feet?” Jesus answered, “What I am doing you do not know now, but afterward you will understand.” Peter declared, “You shall never wash my feet.” Jesus said, “If I do not wash you, you have no part in me.” He will not serve us against our will.

To those who are accustomed to living in a world turned upside down, setting it right cannot help but appear to be turning it upside down. With our first parents we reached for the power to name good and evil, thinking to assert control, and thereby we lost control. With the prodigal son, we grabbed what we could and ended up impoverished and alone in a distant country. Because God is not the God of the philosophers, because God is the God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob, because God is love, He sent His Son to the far country to share our lot, to bear the consequences of our folly, to lead us home to the waiting father.

Such a way of love violates our sense of justice. With John the Baptizer we protest. But Jesus says, “Let it be so now; for thus it is fitting for us to fulfill all righteousness.” Note that he says “thus it is fitting for us to fulfill all righteousness.” He fulfills all righteousness, he does what must be done to set things right, by assuming the burden of our every human wrong. And we, too, have a part in fulfilling all righteousness by letting him do for us what we could not do for ourselves. On the one hand, we would not dare ask him to go to the cross. On the other, we joined in humanity's determination to acquit ourselves by condemning him to the cross. It is the necessary outcome of the verdict, “God is guilty.”

Those who issue a verdict so grotesque deserve to die. Justice would seem to demand it. But God made the long journey into our distant country not to destroy but to give life. John's Gospel puts it this way: “For God sent the Son into the world, not to condemn the world, but that the world might be saved through him.” Even if salvation requires that God is the one who is condemned. God cannot agree to a verdict so manifestly unjust, but He does submit to the sentence that the verdict entails.

If we have even the slightest sense of justice, we recoil at the thought. But what else is to be done about all that has gone wrong? Is there any alternative to its being set right by a yet greater wrong? Or can that greater wrong really be wrong if it is the judgment of God that it should be? If we say this way of atonement is wrong, we are back in the garden presuming to name right and wrong, good and evil. Love is the justice of the God who is love. To John the Baptizer and to us Jesus says, “Let it be so now.” God asks for our consent. Before such a mystery of unbounded love that is bound even to die for the beloved, we offer not only our consent but gratitude exultant. O felix culpa! “O happy fault! O necessary sin of Adam that gained for us so great a Redeemer!”

Atonement. At-one-ment. What was separated by an abyss of wrong has been reconciled by the deed of perfect love. What the first Adam destroyed the second Adam has restored. “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.” We knew not what we did when we reached for the right to name good and evil. We knew not what we did when we grabbed what we could and went off to a distant country. We knew not what we did when, in the madness of excusing ourselves, we declared God guilty. But today we have come to our senses. Today, here at the cross, our eyes are fixed on the dying derelict who is the Lord of life. We look at the one who is everything that we are and everything that we are not, the one who is true man and true God. In him we, God and man, are perfectly one. At-one-ment. Here, through the cross, we have come home. Home to the truth about ourselves. Home to the truth about what God has done about what we have done. And now we know, or begin to know, why this awful, awe-filled Friday is called good.

Dear Dad...

2011-04-10T01:22:00.000-05:00

How are you doing? With the way you're living your life I wonder what you always think about. What do you think of mom? What were things like before now? I'm sure things were a lot better. What was life like back with your mom and dad? I really wish we were closer and could talk more openly. I worry about you and mom and Audrey a lot. I hope you all aren't fighting too much. Could you spend more time with Audrey? I know it's not something you can force on her if she doesn't want to, but I wish yall understood each other better. Then things would be better with mom too wouldn't they?

Do you think about your dad a lot? Or what about China and Taiwan and the US? Do you really enjoy your work? Why did you stop doing taichi and all of those kind of things? I thought you really liked it. And you stopped running too. I wish you did something that was better for you.

Did that whole inability-to-breathe scare you a lot? It scared me a lot. Do you think about what happens after life at all?

I'm glad that we can understand each other more than before, but I wish I had more chances to talk with you deeply. I want to know what your life has been like, where you want to go. And I wish you could accept me for who I am too.

I'll always be praying for you dad.
Happy Birthday
love your son,
Wayne

My Desires

2011-04-04T02:27:00.001-05:00

I can't believe I just left this. Well here's a post thats from June. If I finished or not, here it is :

I have many and specific desires. Hopefully this will become a post and eventually an about page

Life is not just a succession of events or experiences: it is a search for the true, the good and the beautiful. It is to this end that we make our choices; it is for this that we exercise our freedom; it is in this - in truth, in goodness, and in beauty - that we find happiness and joy.

Message of the Holy Father Benedict XVI for the 43rd World Communications Day
[Sunday, 24 May 2009 ]

In the Church there is a diversity of ministry, but a oneness of mission.

-Paul VI, Apostolicam Actuositatem

Abp. Chaput accurately states here that:

Life today may seem very different from life in the 12th century, but human nature—our basic hopes, dreams, anxieties and sufferings—hasn’t really changed. The Christian vocation remains the same: to follow Jesus Christ faithfully, and in following Jesus, to defend Christ’s Church and serve her people zealously, unselfishly and with all our skill.

Kevin puts it very clearly and bluntly here

Another side note: Chinese people are extremely proud of their country. They will never admit that China is any worse than other countries, and they will constantly laud the government and the citizens for China’s rapid growth. In this light, the coach brought up an interesting point during dinner. He mentioned how Chinese people who borrow from the bank invest it wisely and do not waste it on extra spending. They’re constantly investing their money and earning more money. He criticized Americans for spending their money loosely and not investing all of their borrowed money. I guess hearing that rubbed me the wrong way. I don’t see anything wrong with spending money on experiences that you’ll remember for the rest of your life. What’s wrong with living a little and enjoying life? The only end result of investing for the Chinese is to earn more money. What do you do with more money? Keep on investing it? Where does it end? From my short time here so far, I’ve noticed Chinese people are very self serving and materialistic. They have no shame in anything that will put themselves ahead of others. It’s apparent in their mannerisms. While waiting in lines, if you’re moving just a tad too slow, they’ll quickly cut in front of you. If you’re standing in a crowd watching some sort of performance, they have no problem pushing you aside to get the best view. There’s no word for excuse me here, and people here probably won’t use it even if there was. Courtesy is hard to come by here. I can see Christianity really struggling here. Why should I serve others and humble myself? Why must I give up my desire for worldly items when they make me so comfortable? How can God help me be more successful? How can I be fully satisfied with God alone when I lack so much in my life? These are all questions I can see the typical Chinese citizen asking when introduced to God.

A bit excessive on the quoting, I must admit

In the end, nothing is set in stone (except the past, which although set in stone, not everything is instantly revealed). I think it comes down to finding out which desires are placed within me by God, and which ones are of my own.

Money, money, money

2011-04-01T04:59:00.001-05:00

As I grow more aware of how the world works by way of internet, it just tends to be that everyone wants to be happy. No big surprise there. And generally the world finds happiness in.... Money! Again no surprise there.

I guess the big surprise for me then was at what cost companies (some people too) will go to to make money. From making things to just look good and seem good (maybe for you), to making a false good image of the product, service or company, and even putting people( and all living being)s' health at great risk without them likely knowing them.

Maybe I'm just naive, but I first noticed when I was looking into Vibram FiveFingers and barefoot running. I discovered how modern shoes with all their little add-ons have only been around for maybe 70 years at most and that these little add-ons aren't really good for you as they may be appealing to the eye. Those shock absorbers? Not really good for you says Harvard, but who trusts them right?

And just recently I stumbled on this video "The Story of Stuff" which explains how manufactured goods tend to come to and leave from us.

It's all about the money!

And just today, I went to a talk by some Cisco engineers about why Google Android is doing so well. The first point was why does Google want to make an open-source, commercial friendly operating system for manufacturing companies to use for free? So that they can control the market share of people using
(smart)phones and using the internet. So they can have more people looking and and potentially clicking on ads they have. To make money. Oh and how I thought Google might be.

Haha, I'm probably just being over dramatic aren't I?

Even an ethics module I have to do for my communications class has elements of a company just wanting to look good.

Really shouldn't it be love above all else?

At any rate, I'm just overly bitter about how little love there is in the world from groups that affect so many lives.

Luckily the presentation that I went to gave me plenty of chances not to pay attention and just think about random stuff. So there will be plenty of posts coming up as soon as I mull over and develop them more.

On a couple side notes:

This song is even better in it's full original form.

And if you've seen my facebook activity at all, you'd know I like wimp.com. And now that I've found out how to take videos from it and put them into my posts, I may do that more often. The only disadvantage is that I can't prevent it from playing right when someone opens this page. But now you know how to make butter! And a little bit of buttermilk. Hopefully much cooking will ensue over the last bit of school and in the future, living in an apartment and having to actually buy food will ensure such a favorable outcome.

well good night for now then

**edit
The ability to control when a video plays seems to be crucial. So I will be taking that video and just linking:
http://www.wimp.com/makebutter/ or http://thehappyscientist.com/science-video/making-butter

Go the Distance

2011-03-22T01:04:00.006-05:00

I don't understand why someone hasn't made a Catholic version of this. Just change up some of the lyrics and maybe a nice music video haha

Quick Symbols

2011-03-04T02:46:00.008-06:00

So I was looking for symbols for future reference. And here are some that I found.

Of course the ones that everyone know in Schoenstatt are these:

http://journeyofayoungpriest.blogspot.com/2009/06/on-unity-cross.html

And here are some cool ones that I found:

http://www.fotolog.co m/schoenstattyouth/64398789

http://www.fotolog.com/schoenstattyouth/60402434

http://www.5panesy2peces.com.ar/imagenes/schoenstatt/

(This was actually the specif

ic symbol I was looking for)

http://www.austindiocese.org/newsletter_issue_view.php?id=171

(Not a Schoenstatt symbol, but I thought it was cool anyway)

http://www.conelpapa.com/quepersigue/schoenstatt/

http://www.cormariae.com/index.php/youth-groups/

http://informaticarida.blogspot.com/2010/03/caratula.html

http://agenciavanguard.blogspot.com/2009/08/construccion-de-nuevo-centro-espiritual.html

http://www.fotolog.com/david15_bkn/35659180

http://juventudfemenina.wordpress.com/2008/05/20/jornada-juventud

-femenina/

http://schoenstattlinares.wordpress.com/2010/06/17/encuentro

s-par

a-familias-nuevas/

http://vimeo.com/user1182812

http://media.photobucket.com/image/schoenstatt+/FlyingArma

dil

lo/pueretpater002.jpg

http://www.fotolog.com/schoenstattyouth/61846361

http://josecarlosanchez.wordpress.com/identidad/logo-jm/

http://www.santuariovwarcalde.org.ar/Espiritualid

ad/VirgendeSchoenstatt/tabid/331/language/es-AR/Default.aspx

http://www.tiemposmasnuevos.org/schoenstatt.shtml

http://www.annunciationaustin.org/

http://home.windstream.net/christensenr/index.html

http://www.mallinista.com/2009/10/1-jornada-schoenstatt-social-en-san.html

http://www.misantuario.cl/santuarios_de_schoenstatt_en_chile.php

http://josecarlosanchez.wordpress.com/identidad/parche-schmexico-2/

http://holy-and-keen.blogspot.com/

Some from our SUM shirts:

And this last one is pretty unoriginal, but:

right in the heart of texas

The Environment in which a Child grows

2011-03-01T02:38:00.002-06:00

To a certain degree, I grew up in a similar environment as Amy Chua and her children. Although I did not grow up like that all my life, I have some sense to what it's like from personal experience and from the experience of those I know.

I can see that this is one extreme, but also that the way some others may have grown up is another extreme. And as the article suggests, I agree that a good medium is required.

However this last article, I can agree with the most.

I must quote some of what she says, with some emphasis of my own:

Finally, there is no room for God—who calls us into being and prepares us for our vocation by means of myriad promptings that would be crowded out in such a regimented life. Sadly, it would seem that Mrs. Chua’s parenting is oriented to the material world alone—with a strictly utilitarian view of the human person.
I am delighted that her daughters have turned out well with such obvious talent, but where does this parenting theory leave children with learning disabilities, chronic illnesses or other kinds of crises? And what happens to the child whose parent withholds affirmation when he fails or falls short of expectations? If a parent is consumed with material success and visible accolades, how is a child to know unconditional love and the joy of hidden virtue?
Surely, Christians would agree that filial piety is a beautiful thing, but the reverence due to parents is intended as an echo of the veneration due to God, who is the ultimate Father of these children. It is in him that they live and move and have their being, and discipline and proficiency should redound to his greater glory, not our own.
To raise children to be so self-sufficient, so successful, and so capable without teaching them humility and gratitude to the Giver of these gifts would be tragic indeed. As in any proposal, we can sift for the good, adjust our framework if necessary and baptize that which would help us create saints—for that’s the real task at hand.

Around the World

2011-02-16T01:10:00.002-06:00

It's interesting what's going on with the faith around the world. Seems like things are dwindling.

------
even more examples.

lets not forget Katheryn Elizabeth Hudson (katy perry) and the infamous Stefani Joanne Angelina Germanotta (aka lady gaga)
------

But God works in mysterious ways. And at least for the south (of the US) He's working great things, at A&M (yay for pointers, that article links to two articles that have body), and here with us.

+ SUM - Transforming Hearts with Mary +

[On a total side note of pointers, here's a list of questions that have been answered nicely for us all!]

Just wait 50 years. We'll see how everything is then. ("We're just on mop up duty.")

-----
even more examples of the american culture. Particularly high school culture

My Own Kind...

2011-02-15T02:39:00.001-06:00

After reading a little more about St. Terese and her life, I really want to be a type of Louis Martin..
My own kind..

Whatever I'm called to, help me to see

--
again with the father figure. even in the professional realm.

So I'm not crazy

2011-02-06T01:45:00.000-06:00

When I first wrote this and this post, I was confident that such a thing was relevant to us now. And seeing a post from another Catholic blogger, as well as from TED talks is very reassuring.

Now he also says a bit about family (and he does in the series as well. I'm excited about the next season) but I don't think he says enough. Our generation is the way it is because of our families. Our families were lacking, and though it may not be entirely their fault, I feel its a big cause.

Not that Holy and Loving families should be the "vehicle" that is "used" to bring about a better society, but I think it will help children and youth have a better perspective on what is important.

Though God works in mysterious and great ways. I have great expectations for the adventures we'll all be having with God through our lives.

Push vs. Pull

2011-01-05T02:22:00.000-06:00

"If you want to build a ship, don't drum up the men to gather wood, divide the work and give orders. Instead, teach them to yearn for the vast and endless sea." -Antoine de Saint-Exupéry

What do you think? Just think about this for a second.

Got your thought yet? Now think again. For a while i thought this made plenty of sense.
But at double take, if someone yearned for the sea, they could just go swim or surf or something. Of course this was probably written a long time ago so that possibility wouldn't be available.

All of this makes me think of physics and magnets. Magnetic fields may push magnets away radially, or attract radially, as in not in a straight line. Like the magnet, if you're pushed away, you could get away from it in infinitely different directions, each with the slightest difference. And in the same way, you may be pulled toward something depending on where you are. When there's something you're trying to get away from, you may develop a goal without actually wanting that goal as much as you fear.

I guess it sounds like in order to get something you really want do, you need to understand the motivation. This all sounds like a "define the relationship" talk.

found this video from wimp.com and started getting me thinking.

Pursuit II

2010-12-15T01:54:00.001-06:00

Pursuit

2010-12-11T01:00:00.001-06:00

Are you a "Linguini" or a "Remi"?

The Cardinal Virtues

2010-12-03T22:03:00.001-06:00

If you've ever heard or seen Michael Voris on The Vortex, you'd know he's harsh, but that's not necessarily a bad thing.

What he had to say about the cardinal virtues is good. Here are the videos, one for each virtue:

Honest

2010-11-14T01:21:00.000-06:00

Or maybe not.

Either way I think I'm growing a sweet tooth.

But to the main point. It seems to me best to be honest, genuine in all things.
I think it would be better to be joyful than sad. But also it would be worse to be falsely joyful, than genuinely unhappy, that it would be better to happily or unhappily not believing rather than faking to be happy and believe. And I wish to compare my relationship (or not?) with others' with Christ to see if I'm lying to myself, if this is something I'm just hanging on to for the sake of feeling like I have a grip on something.

So I prithee do tell, why(or how?) do you believe(or disbelieve or lack interest) in God?

Decide

2010-11-03T03:18:00.001-05:00

Wow.. well not really wow, but I'm still a kid.

Origin of DECIDE

Middle English, from Latin decidere, literally, to cut off, fromde- + caedere to cut

Something about me?

2010-11-02T20:28:00.002-05:00

I just took a nap. and even in my nap I was picking up other people's trash.

Life

2010-10-29T02:01:00.000-05:00

I look at other people's lives and they're all so amazing.
And I know my life is also amazing, but I can't always see that.

I want to be.. me.
Who am I?

If..

2010-10-05T03:34:00.000-05:00

..we can't help ourselves physically, where the effects we can clearly see and touch and quantify, how will we be able to help ourselves spiritually?

The more I watch this series, the more I realize that how can it be that we can transform ourselves with the help of grace, where the changes are invisible, when we can't help ourselves in things that are visible? (At this hour, I may not be comprehensible, but this is what it is. I'm not taking care of myself and it shows.)

I have to reemphasize this:
“If you ask me what you are to do in order to be perfect, I say, first - Do not lie in bed beyond the due time of rising; give your first thoughts to God; make a good visit to the Blessed Sacrament, say the Angelus devoutly; eat and drink to God’s glory; say the rosary well; be recollected; keep out bad thoughts; make your evening meditation well; examine yourself daily; go to bed in a good time, and you are already perfect.”

If we can't control ourselves physically, how can we control ourselves spiritually? How can we maintain that state of grace if we do not have any self control.

Some Thoughts

2010-10-05T02:39:00.003-05:00

Lots of thoughts going on. These next few weeks are going to be busy. Just being gone all weekend will take its toll.
As I watched this clip from Food Revolution posted by my friend,

a few things come to mind. The food compass of our country seems to be severely messed up. You can see it from the youngest generation.

Of course, this isn't our biggest problem: the same can be said about our moral compass is pretty screwed up (in that even though we know something is bad for us, we still choose it). And just like Oliver's Food Revolution, a more universal revolution needs to happen, a Catholic revolution, a revolution in every facet of our lives. And the start of this is ourselves (Grace can be a big aid in this transformation).

Next, when I decided to watch a little more of this show on youtube, the most liked comment on the video was “that radio presenter is a f*g PRICK!” Again you can see how this revolution needs to take place. Instead of something positive about the program, the focus is on the negative (I think the media has a part in this, being that their greed puts up the most selling titles, being negative), when Oliver's program is, in my opinion, something quite noble.

I may or may not have had a third thing.. I can't recall.

In other thoughts, religion is easily vague to me in its language. I'm not sure if this is supposed to be a test of faith or something of the sort, but I'd really like if things were a bit more concrete, something I can know. Of course there's always the need to trust in God's plan.

(I'm listening to Peter Kreeft and this is something he says: “...The primacy of agape, love rather than the primacy of reason certainly seems to be a scriptural emphasis...He[Aquinas] says with regard to the universe, knowing is higher than loving, with regard to God, loving is higher than loving because when you love something, you become more like it; when you know something, it becomes more like you. When I know a stone, I raise it up to my level because I give it a second life; I make it a thought. When I know God, I drag him down to my level; I reduce Him to what I can know of Him. And therefore, when it comes to relating to God, loving makes you more God-like than knowing God, and therefore it is higher.”)

I got around to reading the reflection on the canonization of Bl. Newman from the Magnificat. Here is part of that reflection:

Lead, kindly light
Jesus said, “No one is good but God alone” (Mk 10: 18). He also said, “So be perfect, just as your heavenly Father is perfect” (Mt 5: 48). Newman understood no contradiction in these two statements, for the goodness of God can perfect imperfect human beings, through the “sanctifying grace” which comes not from us but from God. “If you ask me what you are to do in order to be perfect, I say, first - Do not lie in bed beyond the due time of rising; give your first thoughts to God; make a good visit to the Blessed Sacrament, say the Angelus devoutly; eat and drink to God’s glory; say the rosary well; be recollected; keep out bad thoughts; make your evening meditation well; examine yourself daily; go to bed in a good time, and you are already perfect.” The Christian is called to holiness, which is greater than philanthropy. Newman’s intellectual brilliance was a servant of a light beyound his genius: “As the sun’s light comes to us reflected and refracted, so God’s saints are the means under which his glory comes to us.”
…
A cardinal and a saint
The holy ones, not the clever ones, were his guide, and he latched on to the model of Saint Philip Neri, joining the Oratory which Neri had founded, and establishing one in Birmingham where he lived out his years, running a school, paying coal bills, guiding converts, and helping an influx of immigrants. “I have no tendency to be a saint - it is a sad thing to say. Saints are not literary men, they do not love the classics, they do not write tales. I may be well enough in my way, but it is not the ‘high line.’ It is enough for me to black the saints' shoes - if Saint Philip uses blacking, in heaven.”
Saints never think of themselves as saints, but their humility also dispenses with humbug modesty. When a child asked the old man which is greater, a cardinal or a saint, he replied with gentle ambiguity: “Cardinals belong to this world, and saints to heaven.”

On a side note:

If only we could pile up all that’s messed up in our lives. Also reminds me how blessed I am to have all the different influences I’ve had in my life. (and I really didn’t enjoy the note that said “all about the money”.)

Last of all, reading the Federalist Papers is quite interesting. Just read #62 which gives a few reasons why government that changes so quickly is bad. It makes me think that only policies and laws that are accepted by the nation as a whole will survive and be put into action. In the same way, groups, especially school groups where the change in members is different every year (and college in particular because it is most free, and those who are more long standing like teachers are not as involved) are only able to consistently carry out the unified will of the members.
I guess what I’m trying to poke at is that unless the will of God is accurately discerned, there will be no stability in groups, as the will of the Father is that which will be adhered to whether the group knows it or not.

Some final words about Oliver's project. He says some pretty profound things despite coming from a secular background (my own assumption). He talks starting from around 8:15. This foreshadows for us the hardship we will go through, even if we do all with love.

Well that’s enough for one night. Hopefully I’ll get to those posts that I have lined up to write.

Peace.

Healthy Horns.. not so Healthy

2010-09-28T22:02:00.000-05:00

So as Mr. Bill Powers sends out emails including information about mental health and such, I decide to check it out (and also his blog about stuff on campus) and part of it includes helping those addicted to few and certain things.

And so I look at the "Healthy" Horns website and I'm just disgusted. If you look at some of the classes they offer, (from what I saw) the class for "methods of 'contraception' " is offered more often than any of the others I saw (some classes you have to request it).

Just disgusts me....

St. Augustine, pray for us

A Lark

2010-09-28T20:28:00.002-05:00

As a note to my future self, today was the day of the shooting, the day that Colton Tooley took his own life.

For the sake of His sorrowful passion…

How to Join Jesus on his Journey

The future will be what we make it; let us reflect on this thought so that it may motivate us to act. Especially, let us realize that all collective reform must first be individual reform. Let us work at transforming ourselves and our lives. Let us influence those around us, not by useless preaching, but by the irresistible power of our spirituality and the example of our lives.

Let us give ourselves generously and try to strengthen our faith and expand our understanding, confident that all will come to us to be rekindled and to enlighten their hearts and minds.

The world is unable to recognize spiritual reality; it does not know how to penetrate the outer covering that veils our inmost self. Any unconquerable strength, purity, and truth in us is seen in our depths only by him who lives in us and judges us with more justice and love than men and women. What a reason to be faithful and courageous in daily life! Nothing goes unnoticed by our eternal Guest; the least of our actions has a profound effect on others.

Let us love. Let our lives be a perpetual song of love for God, first of all, and for all human beings who suffer, love, and mourn. Let deep joy live in us. Let us be like the lark, enemy of the night, who always announces the dawn and awakens in each creature the love of light and life. Let us awaken others to the spiritual life. [here I have to plug in my favorite song, Alive Again, though I don’t know how to put it in, but you can look it up]

Why do we put off doing the good until tomorrow? Why do we wait to be wealthy before giving? Is not the gift of ourselves better than money, and is there any time when we could not offer a tear or a smile to someone who is suffering in distress? Cannot a word from us strengthen someone in distress? Cannot an act of pure love coming from the depths brighten a sad life?

~Elisabeth Leseur

Elisabeth Leseur († 1914) was a French married laywoman whose cause for canonization is underway.

Today’s meditation from Magnificat.

If only there was someone there for Colton, then maybe things would have turned out better for him, but let us not live in the world of “if”s, and let us do, let us love.

About the analogy of the lark, I think the lark would be a better simile for the prophets, and we may be the birds singing after the dawn (Christ) has come. Unless the dawn symbolizes the second coming of Christ as well, then that would make sense.

Also, you should read/listen to this. Its titled “How to Win the Culture War.” I think it's very appropriate for today as with happened on campus and that tomorrow is the feast day of the Archangels Michael, Gabriel, and Raphael.

It is a bit witty, but interest and quite easy to listen to.

Saint Michael the Archangel,
defend us in battle.
Be our protection against the wickedness and snares of the devil.
May God rebuke him, we humbly pray;
and thou, O Prince of the Heavenly Host -
by the Divine Power of God -
cast into hell, satan and all the evil spirits,
who roam throughout the world seeking the ruin of souls.

Amen

Fatherless...

2010-09-26T01:09:00.004-05:00

When I think of all the people who grew up fatherless in this world, it makes me want to cry... If only they could all have fathers who loved and cared for them.

But I've got to trust that this too is part of my Father's plan, and relying on my Father, lead the life of a father.

Background

2010-09-22T22:41:00.000-05:00

Perhaps I should change my background. I am a unique person and Schoenstatt does not represent all of me. I'm not sure that a collage of my whole life would be good either, just because that would be time consuming and would probably look fairly obnoxious. Now just to think of something... Also many posts to come, not necessarily soon. I'd like to chew them over in my mind for a while. And then chew them some more once I've started putting it all down.

Peace